Crossroads

Emotions

We're do you go when the inspiration runs dry? Why do you keep the candle lit at night watching the wax melt slowly. The window pain from the rear view mirror as I drive away...you can't end a conversation just because you closed the chat. Hiding and ignoring it won't make it go away. You'll continue to make the same mistakes until you finally learn you lesson. Then the lesson will finally stop showing itself.

When your afraid to look in the mirror to see the person you have become. You shut the door and cry silently. You hope all your hopes and dreams in a box...in the attic.

You write your life wonders in a book or a journal that once inspired you to write in it. Now you just hold it close to your chest while yours sitting on the floor by the open front door on a rainy day drinking your cheap glass of red wine while you cry with the hope you once had which is now lost to the wind......in the cage you made for yourself just to feel safe but instead of feelings safe you keep yourself so busy that your to tired and it numbs the pain of the reality you made...the mess you made....it makes time alone so much harder....when your alone with your thoughts and you have to fight yourself to feel anything.....but yet you get up and put on a mask that is see through....

I wish I was see through....that when I pass on the streets you never looked my way...I'm a black trash bag that you over look like that homeless person sleeping on the corner on a gas station....but yet here I am just putting on a smile because I have been there before that low before. I smile because it might save a life from jumping off a bridge or stepping out in front of a car...I smile because it makes other people happy...not because I'm happy.

When you asked me if I could pack my things and I told you I could fit it in a backpack. It wasn't because I'm not attached to things it's because I have been use to running and leaving. So by the time you found me I had tired myself and stay...rested and sat for awhile. I'm not sure if I'm ready to walk again that statement still remains true. My things can fit in a backpack but I'm not sure where I'm heading to...