Chapter Seventeen - I Imagine Death So Much It Feels More Like A Memory, Oh Wait

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He often dreamt about his mom, happy and full of light. Those nights lead to the worst mornings, mornings full of loss and hopelessness. It hurt knowing that someone he loved, someone who loved him was gone and would never return to him. Ever since childhood the pain sat there in his mind, usually passively. The wondering of where she was, if she was happy was always there like a quiet humming. Every thought was embedded with her, whether he noticed or not. But now his grief was burned into his every thought and action, painful and angry. He missed her more than words could possibly explain, and he hated that he would never get to see her again.

Today was one of those mornings, his very being ached with longing. His pillow dampened with tears when he awoke, it was going to be a very long day. But he would survive, unfortunately he was pretty damn good at it.

His side was healing pretty well so he could just use gause pads and medical tape. He turned on his shower as hot as possible to steam the bloody pads off, slowly unwrapping the layers of tight tensor bandages that felt like they held his organs in. After a few minutes they slowly begin to come off, peeling down and falling to the floor with a damp splat. The wound looked great, it was red but not infected which was pretty unusual for Tommy. Delicate stitches held way better than anything he had done before, they looked like they were made of something way stronger than just whatever thread he could find. He carefully re-bandaged it, turning the blow drier on while it sat on the table so nobody would question his dry hair. Tossing on his favourite shirt and pants he grabbed his pin-covered backpack, ready for school.

He slipped into the kitchen and grabbed a few pieces of toast with strawberry jam that were set out for him and walked out the front door. His family were at a meeting this morning so at least they wouldn't be asking any questions, and Tubs and his dad were driving him which he was excited about. The elevator ride was calm as he went down a floor.

Lightly he taps on the door, almost being knocked over as the door is swung open. Arms pulled him into a tight embrace.

"Morning Toms, dad is just finishing getting ready." The shorter smiles.

"Good morning Tubbee That's no big deal, I should still finish breakfast so that I don't mess up your dad's car." He chuckles.

"Strawberry?" Tubbo smirks, gesturing at the toast.

"Always, it's clearly the best fruit." The blond proceeds to shove an entire piece in his mouth.

"You really should scare me dude, and yet." He drags out the last word with a smile.

"Well you already scare me." Tommy winks jokingly.

"It's a skill." The brunet chuckles.

"Alright kids, ready to go?" The older man asks as he walks into the room.

"We are, thank you for driving me." Tommy says awkwardly.

"Kid, let's make one thing very clear." The man deepens as he approaches, placing a hand on the teen's shoulder. "You never have to thank me for helping you out, you are a part of the family."

"Exactly dude, you have a room here." The shortest sighs.

"No making me cry, there's school for that." The blond huffs.

"That's fair, let's get going" Mister Schlatt smiles at the two teens before grabbing his keys off the counter and walking them out.

"Be safe you two!" Schlatt calls out as they walk away from the car.

"Thanks dad!" The shorter shouts back before turning his voice to a whisper. "So we need to chat."

"After school? We can meet at the bench." He winks and receives a knowing look.

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