"I'm sorry, Mr. Namjoon," the doctor somberly expressed, his eyes reflecting the gravity of the situation.
His words landed on me like an anvil, the weight of them settling deep within. I had known the situation was dire, but hearing it made the reality all the more overwhelming.
"His cardiac condition has reached a critical juncture, with 80% of his heart already succumbing to infection. Without prompt surgical intervention, I fear for the worst."
As the doctor spoke, I felt the room closing in, the sterile scent of the hospital mingling with the suffocating heaviness in my chest. The truth hung in the air, and I found myself grappling with the harsh reality of the situation.
Feeling awful lately, my symptoms worsened, and breathing became a struggle. After trying different doctors, I ended up here. With Namjoon hyung by my side as my main guardian, I waited outside the room as hyung talked to the doctor. My curiosity took over, prompting me to eavesdrop on their conversation.
I had a hunch it wasn't good, but the severity caught me off guard.
To add to the distress, my best friend, the very stubborn Kim Taehyung, inadvertently heard the whole grim discussion at the hospital.
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"Is... is he going to make it, doctor?" Tae asked, his voice trembling, revealing the depth of concern and fear.
The doctor paused for a moment, choosing his words carefully.
"I believe you understand the answer, given the circumstances. His heart is deteriorating rapidly. And if we do not act swiftly then-"
Breaking in with a choked sob, he reassured, "Don't worry, doctor. I won't let anything happen to him. If anything happens, if it ends up coming to that, I'll just give him my own heart."
A bittersweet smile graced my face as I heard those selfless words from the other side of the wall, a bittersweet smile played on my lips. Internally, I laughed at the depth of his commitment, yet I couldn't help but yearn for a different revelation.
"Idiot.
How do I tell you that its probably your fault my heart is like this? After all, it is you who have had possession of my heart all along. Since the very moment you entered my life, my heart has been seeking you out. It's been yours from the start, you idiot."
"Only if I could tell you that, if only you could feel that. If only-"
Before I could finish, a tear rolled down my cheek, and I choked on the words.
"But I guess we don't have any time now, huh? Just stuck with the 'only if.'"
As the realization settled in, I couldn't contain the flood of emotions. The echo of 'only if' reverberated in my mind, a painful reminder of missed chances and unspoken feelings. I glanced up beyond the hospital wall, as if searching for answers .
In that moment, the hospital room felt like a battleground between life and regret. The sound of a heart monitor far away beeped steadily, oblivious to the emotional storm brewing within the walls.
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