In the beginning, he would smile when he heard my voice, he'd act like if he never heard it before. He'd kiss me, like if it was the end of the world the next day. He'd say he loved me when he had the chance, no matter what we were doing. He looked at me like I was the center of his happiness. He'd hold me, as if it was going to be the last time he would. He would never leave my side, it felt like it was just us in the world. But sadly that was the beginning, things change in the middle and everything has an end. His eyes were so full of happiness, they'd sparkle, now they're dull and brown. That sparkle isn't there anymore. He doesn't smile when he hears my voice, instead he cringes a little when he hears it sometimes. He doesn't kiss me goodnight, but I still love him.
He was there for me when my family kicked me out of the house for telling them I didn't see myself marrying a woman in my future, but I saw my future with him. They were disgusted, and I was hurt. Now I just laugh, not at the whole situation but at them, because they cared more about my sexuality than my own happiness. I did end up married to him, with or without them. He proposed to me on one of our movie nights and I said yes. I can't stand up and walk away from him, not after what he's done for me. We were happy together, maybe we can still be happy if we try, but I can't help but wonder what I did wrong.
~
I'm standing outside our house, my hand on the door knob. Something seems different, I don't know what it is. I don't know if it's good or bad. Nothing around me was different, the house was the same color as it was before I left, nothing was different. There was a feeling in my stomach and my mind is telling me to go back into the car, and drive off to someplace else. Go away, get in the car and don't come back. I shrug it off, it's probably nothing, I think afterwards. I'm always over thinking, I take off my coat, and then kick off my shoes, one then the other. "I'm home!" I yell and walk to the living room at the same time. I flop onto the red couch we got from a friend who moved away to a small apartment and groan in satisfaction. It's our daily routine, I'd yell I got home, he'd pretend he cares and ask how my day was, I'd answer same as everyday, we'd watch tv(or I would,he'd usually just go through his phone and maybe text someone), and I'd be the first one to go to bed. He's usually sitting on the couch. I sit up and I look at the place he would usually be sitting and there was a shirt taking his spot. I'm smiling, it was a blue v-neck shirt. His favorite color is blue, half of his wardrobe is all blue. He even bought some blue shoes that he never wears. I pick the shirt up and smell it, thinking I'd be smelling his favorite cologne he always wears. And there it was, that feeling I felt when I was outside again.
~
Hi guys :) so I know it's short and stuff and I'm going to add more to it right after I get help thinking of a title so yeaaah thanks for reading. X
