Snake Eater - THE BRAVO BOYS [book three]

Chapter FORTY ONE

Logan Nash

...a few days later...

I can't pinpoint the last time I had this incandescent feeling.. Maybe never.. Or at least it must have been so long ago that I have lost all memory of it.. Somewhere between the innocence of youth, the stranglehold of captivity, the rush of emancipation and the ache of grief, I had lost sight of myself.. I became a new man, rigid and inflexible in my beliefs, narrow minded in my principles and closed off to the possibility that I could know peace.. Yet here I am, for what feels like the first time in my life I think I finally understand contentment..

Suddenly, I don't feel the need to busy my every second with an impossible workload just to distract myself.. I hardly have any room in my thoughts for anything other than Shelby, and the way her smile lights up her starry eyes when she laughs..

Fuck.. When she laughs..
There's no sweeter sound..

Still despite myself, I can't seem to cast light upon the shadow of doubt that gnaws away in the most repressed crevices of my subconscious.. Part of me wants to ignore the seeds of suspicion that have begun to sprout.. Salt the soil and forget everything I know to be true.. Yet happiness as I have always known it, is a fleeting and temporary relief that could be ripped away at any moment, leaving behind an emptiness worse than anything in its wake..

Why can't I shake this heavy feeling?
What is it that I am missing?

"Quit staring, Barbie.." My fingers race across the keys of my office computer to correct the complex exploit code displayed on screen..
I am so fucking close to breaching Gabriel, I can practically taste binary and electricity.. It won't be long before I will have a direct window into the back rooms of Blackstar.. All their secrets will belong to me.. And this time, I don't just plan on wreaking a little havoc and moving a few million dollars..

No.. I'm going to burn the whole motherfucking machine to the ground..

From her perch on the corner of my desk, I can feel Shelby's sharp eyes searing me, the heat of her watchful gaze warming my skin as I take a peek at the time to find an early afternoon hour.. "Aren't you gonna be late for your meeting with Iris?"

"Iris can wait.." Shelby's playful purr is far too distracting.. "Besides, this is way more critical.."

Abandoning my software script, I push back in my chair to grin at her.. "You know watching me won't make this go any faster.."

"You think that's why I'm watching you?" The Army Barbie smiles, crossing one denim glad knee over the other.. "Oh, you really haven't been paying attention, Lone Star.."

"Aw yeah?" Bushing a loose lock back out of my eyes, I shake my head.. "And here I was thinking you were just using me as a distraction.. Avoiding what you know you gotta do.."

With the roll of her sparkling sapphires, she lets out an irritated huff.. "Ugh, do I really have to go to a meeting with Iris just so that she can tell me some bullshit story about how sorry she is for lying to me all this time?" She hops down with a bounce, swaying around the desk to perch herself on my knee.. "Wouldn't you rather I stay here and- assist you." With a sexually charged energy, Shelby claims my lips with hers, reaching down between us to rub at my hardening cock..

The scent of her flowery shampoo and soft skin grazing against mine is a heavenly gift.. It would be so easy to get carried away in this moment.. To lose track of time and give in to the carnal urge she incites.. All I want is to bend her over my desk and fuck her until she comes so many times that she forgets how to speak..

But something tells me she needs more from me and it wouldn't be right for us to ignore the truth.. If I want to be with her, to really be the man she deserves, I have to be there for her.. I have to support what is best for her and not just what I want..