Retrograde

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I sat like that for a long time. That was until I was told about dinner. The woman who had brought in my clothes was the one who knocked on my bedroom door.

"C-Come in..." I managed, my head had been resting on top of my arms which were perched on my knees. As I looked up I received a cramp in my neck, it felt stiff but I was fine.

"Young mistress, your parents have requested that you change into appropriate attire for dining." She told me.

"O-Okay, thank you."

"Do you need any help getting changed?"

"N-No, I'm fine, really." I assured her.

"Alright, I shall speak with you later then." With that she exited the room and closed the door quietly behind her. I climbed to my feet only to have a head spin. I clutched my head and used the wall as support. Blurred visions continued to flash through my mind but I couldn't understand what they were nor could I understand what they meant.

Once the spinning had stopped I stood up straight and approached my suitcase. I crouched down and then sat on my knees as I unzipped the suitcase and began to unpack clothing. I walked into a nearby cupboard and found that it was full of clothing that a small child would have worn. With a slight pang of confusion I shook my head and proceeded to hand up my clothing.

My clothing consisted of frilled dresses one would find a gothic Lolita, or any Lolita in general wearing. I loved frills and ribbons and my grandmother had always said that it was because part of my younger self still remained within my confused soul. I had come to accept this statement after a while although it still puzzled me.

Once I had completed the process of hanging up my clothing and placing my shoes inside my cupboard I selected a pale pink and white dress which was shortened at the front and became longer at the back, it was decorated with lace and frills and was one of my favourite pieces of clothing.

I then entered the bathroom through the walk in wardrobe and looked at myself in the mirror. This was something I dreaded because every time I looked at myself in the mirror I was greeted by somebody completely different to who I perceived myself to be. It was as if I were looking at a different person, a lost individual from afar. It was painful but I had learnt to cope with it.

A brush was already resting on the basin. I picked it up and ran a hand over the bristles, I then raised the brush so that I could comb it through my long dark brown hair. My hair was knotted from all of the wind during this cold weather but I didn't mind it.

Once I was done I slowly and cautiously made my way downstairs. I was afraid. It felt as if I were living within a household of strangers. People I had never met, people I hadn't had any close bonds with. Even though it was said that I used to live with these people it was still difficult for me to accept.

I shakily headed towards the dining room where Kenshin pulled out a chair and asked me to take a seat. I did as asked and began to ring my hands.

"What a lovely dress." My Mother observed with a kind smile.

"Th-Thank you." I replied shyly.

"Once we leave for work Kenshin and Kotone will only appear at this household to do the cleaning which will be once every week. Our cook will also be gone so you will need to purchase your own meals... We are going to leave money behind so that you can get by." My Father explained.

"O-Okay..." as unaffected as I seemed the fact that I would be within the house all alone frightened me. My grandmother had never left me alone, she always made sure that I had somebody with me.