Retrograde

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"They aren't the way they used to be... your eyes were once full of life but not they seem to be lost within a sea of emotion." Kaito murmured, he then stroked my dark brown hair and tucked a loose strand behind my ear. My face suddenly felt warm and I couldn't understand why. The emotions I was currently feeling were emotions I hadn't felt before. Or rather, they were emotions I may have felt before but had forgotten.

"I-I'm sorry..." I apologized.

Kaito gave me a small smile, "There's no need to apologize." Although he was smiling, Kaito's smile still refused to reach his dull eyes.

"You speak of my eyes seeming to appear confused, but your eyes look like they're hiding a lot of pain..."

Kaito's sad eyes widened for a moment and he let out a quiet gasp. I wasn't sure if it was a gasp of hope or surprise. And as soon as his eyes changed they immediately returned to looking composed.  Kaito then began to ruffle his own fringe and looked away. I noticed his cheeks had become slightly pink.

"U-Uh, um... Honoka, it's late. You should go to bed." Kaito managed after a moment.

"But... if I go to sleep now... won't you be gone when I wake up?" I wondered.

Kaito looked over at me again and gave me a small smile. "No, I'll be here for as long as you want me to be. Besides, I have a spare room in this house I used to stay in. It's been a while since then now though..." When Kaito spoke his last sentence he looked off into the distance as if reminiscing. It made me happy and sad at the same time. I wished that I too, could reminisce about the past but however that was impossible for me.

"Okay, I shall head to bed then." I stated, Kaito looked back at me.

"I'll come upstairs too, may as well get settled in my room, your parents already put my belongings in there."

"Okay." I nodded and then ascended the stairs with Kaito by my side. Kaito walked me to my bedroom.

"I'll just be down the hall, if you need anything feel free to come and get me. If I'm asleep you can wake me up."

"Okay, thank you." I replied as I placed my hand on the brass door handle and pushed the button down to open my door. I entered my room, and entered my cupboard. I scanned my nightwear and found myself thinking about the blonde haired boy I had seen in the abandoned mansion. It confused my as to why he had suddenly disappeared but I confirmed that he was probably shy and headed home out another door. But as I found myself coming back to the boy it was as if a light had switched on in my mind. I felt as if I knew him but I couldn't understand where I knew him from.

The boys straw yellow hair stood out the most and his dull blue eyes looked similar to Kaito's, however they didn't reflect sadness they reflected a strong form of happiness and excitement. If I were to compare both Kaito and the boy I had seen it would be as if the boy who had hair as yellow as straw was the sun and Kaito who's hair was a dark as the midnight sky was the moon. The two of them contradicted one another. It was interesting when comparing. However, no matter how many times I compared the two. The comparisons refused to lead me closer to the things I had forgotten about which occurred in the past. I had forgotten half of the year from when I was ten years old and I had forgotten everything before then also. It frightened me. But I had learnt to be strong and deal with it alone.

It was incredibly difficult living alone in a world of confusion and uncertainty. Alone within yourself, being unsure about who you were or what had happened during your life. But it was something I learnt to deal with and my grandmother stated that I would probably remember everything when the time came. I soon shook off all of my thoughts and changed into my pyjamas. I then climbed into bed and lay there for a while staring up at the underside of the canopy which rested over my bed.