Empty Spaces

Entry 3

Dear Kelsy,

Do you remember when we met? It wasn't long after I had moved here. You sat next to me in math because I was the only one alone. I don't know why you did that, but I'll never forget it. You started my school life off to a good start.

You were one of my first friends and made me feel like I could be honest about anything. You helped me realize that it was all going to be okay, and that's why you get to hear this. I'm risking everything sending this to you, but you need it. I need you to need it.

Well, back to what is important. Homecoming was coming up and we were all frantic for dates. You had your boyfriend, and I figured Cam would want to go with me. He had friends here, so he could tell his parents he went with them. Then I would 'go with friends' and then happen to meet him there.

He planned everything out and had this set-in motion. He wanted to match his tie to my blue dress. It was from a Quinceanera earlier in the year, and he liked it on me. Then he had his hoco but he said he was going with friends. Then 'friends' turned into a girl. He told me that his best friend was taking a girl and she wanted her best friend to go. So, they would hangout to get their friends to date. 

Made sense to me, so I was fine with it. But then he told me he didn't want to go to hoco with me at mine because he spent $300 on this 'friend'. He doesn't even offer to buy me food when we go out. That weird to you? Me too. 

Then he stopped calling and texting me. Our late-night conversations shrunk to nothing, and I found myself desperate for his attention. But he liked her, and how could I compete? I would go home and cry for hours and hours but act fine. No one knew and I thought I was making a problem that didn't exist? So, I hide it. Deep down, so far that no one knew. MAybe no one ever will...