a perimeter around pain

Three nuns enter the bar

Things at the OCS were never easy but it was getting progressively worse by the minute. There was nothing the Mother Superior could do, after all it was inside you that all the turmoil was brewing.

It started really innocently. Camila had suggested they would go have a drink
"We are nuns but we still live on this earth. It's time we become more worldly, how are we supposed to relate to people if we don't know what their struggles are."

"And how is going to a bar going to help, exactly?"

"I think she means you actually have to speak to people to help them, I think that's just nasty." Lilith scoffs but steps forward to enter the small bar.

"Three nuns enter the bar... looks like the start of some dad joke." the woman smiles at them, clearly happy for the distraction on the very empty bar. "It's a little early for the happy hour but I can make an exception for the servants of the Lord."

The first thing you notice is her smile, if you didn't know any better you would say she was the world's most charming being. face of an angel but clearly the mischief of the devil. it suited her, like her outfit, the cropped top and the overalls. simply letting her natural charm sleep through. like a warm embrace the angel on your shoulder says. you think, like a snake in the silence of the night, in the faint voice of your mother as a residue of all the humiliations you endured as a kid. you brush it off, it's all forgiven and in the past. you just have to shoot those intrusive thoughts as they come by.

The woman introduces herself as Ava, she runs the bar most of the time with her mate Hans. At the end of the room you see some regulars that treat her on a first name basis, you wonder if some day that will be you. For now you just watch Camila and Lilith run over the menu and ask about some beers and muse over how friars dedicated themselves to making beer in Belgium and how Mother Superion would react if they wanted to start their own brewery at Cat's cradle.

"Dos cervezas." Ava says as she hands them their drinks. "and for you?"

"I guess just some coffee please."

"I guess you always need to stay alert. It will wear you out sister, you should learn to take a break."

"Shit that was ridiculously on point." Lilith says between her teeth.

"Language." it's the only thing you can say as the words are still echoing in your head.

—

The second time you enter that bar you decide to try some mild evangelisation. It would be highly rewarding to help others find their way into the lord. not forced or by subduing, just spreading the love.
She regretted it as soon as the words left her mouth.

"To each their own i guess, but I really don't believe in a higher being." Ava says looking away from you and fumbling with her dish rag.

"Really?" you touched a nerve you desperately wish to untouch.

"Yeah and there's literally nothing you all can say to make me change my mind." It's short and incisive but not aggressive. You were just put in your place with grace, as if the problem is with everyone else in the world, not you. You breathe a little deeper, exhaling in relief.

"i'm sure ---"

"Have you ever been into foster care? No god would allow that." She stops in the middle of the bar and turns to you with the saddest look on her face.

"I guess you have a point. I'm not going to argue with you." You answer quietly and pick up the drinks, you decide to live a little. You are already regretting it.

There was a tug in her heart, the way Ava said it. The pain concentrated on those words. you have to take some of it back, or at least make her feel a little better. That's your whole purpose as a nun, to make people feel a little better about their circumstances.