Riddlebat Oneshots

❓ 🦇 Part one

(Written by the Nashton to my Battinson)
There he was again , sitting at his laptop and typing away with his scrawny fingers and hunched back. Except this time tears were pooling at his desk , each stream flowing down his rosy cheeks with a sniffle. 

‘ The Riddler <?>… ‘

It said as he signed in , preparing himself for what he was going to write. and oh , the things he would leave the bat. A sweet confession of admiration and a silent apology. An apology for not ridding the city of its scums , for not squaring up and giving him the option for them to run away together. To leave this city of garbage and finally be at peace with one another. 

“Nothing can fill the void and the sadness this brings” he began , “There are a billion words in the english vocabulary yet I am only left with a few. The agony - the pain. Of knowing I will never be enough , will never be what everyone wants me to be. It’s unbearable.” 

Nashton chuckled at himself and whimpered, pausing for a moment to compose himself. Jesus he was such a wimp! What would Batman think? He can’t even finish a letter , how’d he expect himself to become the greatest antihero the universe had ever seen?  

He chewed at his nails , leg bouncing anxiously. He pushed his chair back and looked over his shoulder , glancing towards the open window , curtains pushed aside and everything. It was all thought through , every little bit. 

The GCPD would find him splat dead on the street and figure out his identity , announcing his death to the papers with glee. Happy the people of Gotham could finally live in peace without having to lift a single finger. It would go to show how little they cared about people like him , wouldn’t it? - he was sick , as much as he hated to admit. His obsession with the vigilante was by far extreme. 

But could you blame him? Batman was perfect! He was so strong and brave! — everything Nashton was…well. not. 

He swung back to his computer and took a deep breath before typing once again. “Sitting here and planning my death fills me with unimaginable dread , not because I have anything to miss but because I am proving how weak I am - how disappointing would it be if he were to stumble upon me? Would he crouch down and examine me in disgust or would he pity me? Not that I care , I won’t be here to find out anyway. I really did wish he wasn’t the only reason why I considered even staying on this wretched planet , he doesn’t even know who I am.” Ed gulped and shook his head. Of course he doesn’t! Nobody would want to know Edward Nashton. His parents certainly didn’t want to. 

“This is my final message to the Batman.

Thank you for keeping me so hopeful until now. If it weren’t you , this whole thing would have happened so much sooner - I suppose you’d be happy if it did though wouldn’t you? I’m enough trouble as it is. Too bad you love that snobby thing. What was her name? Selina? Oh who cares. We would’ve been happy together if it weren’t for her really. Enough with the negativity , it’s time for me to say goodbye. I won’t miss you , but I’ll wait for you. No matter how long it takes , I’ll be perched on the roof of a church and silently watch you lurk around Gotham , it’s a silly thought isn’t it? Deceased but yet still totally infatuated with you - oh , if the pain wasn’t so hard I would’ve stayed. Alas it’s too late now , no need to say your prayers , the people of Gotham city are finally safe again all thanks to the police. Or so they think. 

Signing off , goodbye all. 

- Edward Nashton.” 

Finally , the worst was over. Sure , it was a little cheesy and whatever , but he believed it was good enough to get his point across. Sappy or not. 

Now to the main event. Ed took off his glasses and pursed his lips , turning to face the window before stumbling backwards with a gasp , a figure perched on his window sill , face stern and eyes squinting. “B- Batman!” He shrieked , he wasn’t sure if it was out of pure excitement or not.

The vigilante stood dead silent , eerily making his way through the window and over to the scrawny man’s computer , taking a moment to scan the screen with his eyes. Shit , he didn’t even turn it off. What a dumbass. 

“It’s not what you thin-“

“You were planning a suicide?” He interrupted Nashton in that gravelly voice of his , it sent shivers down his spine. 

“Yes!- aaa I mean no!” His answer wasn’t convincing enough though , the man seemed to be walking towards him , maybe making Ed a little nervous at the way he seemed to tower over him oh so easily. To the brunettes surprise , he pulled off his cowl and stared down at him with sad eyes. 

Batman pitied him! Batman felt bad for him! Maybe they were meant to be! - he thought obsessively. 

It may have taken him a moment or two to come to the realization that Bruce Wayne was standing in-front of him though and when he did , he wasn’t sure how to feel. Here he was , thinking Bruce was a spoiled rich boy who only really cared about himself - but it seems he was wrong. By the looks of it anyway. “Bruce Wayne.” He mumbled , struggling to catch up with his thoughts. 

“Riddler.” The latter hummed , voice still giving the shorter man butterflies. How odd. 

Edward rolled his eyes and put his wrists together , preparing himself for handcuffs. “I’m not taking you down to Arkham.” Bruce began , “not in this state…not like this.”