Aideen's Answer

~Chapter Nineteen~

Aideen headed back to the castle as quickly as possible and slipped unnoticed back up to her chambers.

'What an exhausting day,' She thought as she collapsed upon her bed. 'So many different things happening, I can scarcely take it all in. Was Eric's injury really just this morning? That feels like days ago!'

Eric's words to Mitchell floated through her mind.

Life without family is not worth living.

'Ah, but what is life without love?' She argued with herself.

Can love fill the emptiness inside you?

'Of course it can!' Aideen though vehemently as she sat up in bed, 'There is no emptiness when I am with Kevin!'

But, when you are alone, it nearly overtakes you. Is that normal for a woman in love? A bride-to-be, no less?

Aideen laid back and buried her head in her pillow. 'I do not want to think like this! Kevin is my life! And I WILL go with him! I am going to elope with the man I love! In two days time, I will begin the rest of my life as his bride.' A tear slipped down her cheek, 'And I will never see my wonderful family again.'

She clutched her pillow to her chest and finally allowed herself the release she so desperately needed.

She cried.

She cried as she thought of never seeing her precious parents again. For not being there as her brothers fell in love, for missing Mitchell growing up, for not being able to stand up with Samantha on her wedding day, for not being able to experience the joys of Samantha and Eric's children, as well as her own nieces and nephews. She pictured the pain her parents and siblings would experience when they realized she had gone, her mother crying in her fathers arms. She thought of Samantha weeping as she realized that Aideen had broken their bond.

She wept until she had no tears left and her pillow was soaked. She cried herself to sleep.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The morning dawned, bright and clear. Aideen stirred slowly, feeling the sun on her face.

"Good morning, miss. Rough night?"

Aideen smiled at who it was.

"Good morning Regan, yes, it was a bit. But nothing too awful, I must look a fright, however."

"Nay, you are beautiful as always, miss."

"Why, thank you, Regan," Aideen said as she sat up and eased out of bed.

"You are welcome, is this gown suitable for today?" She asked as she held up a scarlet gown with gold trim and puffy sleeves.

"Oh, I love that one!" Aideen answered with a smile.

She went to Regan and she slipped the dress over her head. She sat down and enjoyed the feeling of Regan doing her hair. In no time at all, her hair was finished, curled and styled atop her head.

"You are ready!" Regan said with a flourish as she pinned the last curl.

Aideen could not help but smile at her reflection as she answered, "It looks wonderful, Regan! As usual. I may look ready, but I do not believe I am prepared to face this day. Would I be able to take my breakfast in here today?"

"Of course! Are you not feeling well?"

"Oh, I am quite all right, I simply want a bit of time to myself before I join the family."

"Yes, miss, I shall be back with that shortly."

When Regan left the room, Aideen stood and went to her desk. She sat down, took out her writing supplies, and took a deep breath.

'You can do this,' She told herself. 'You would want at least a note if it were anyone else, your family deserves nothing less.'

With shaking hands, she began her letters. She started with one for Mitchell. She told him how special he was, how much she loved him and how she would miss him. She said she hoped he would not be too hurt by her leaving but that one day he would understand.

When she completed that one, she wrote one for each of the twins. She explained her relationship with Kevin and begged them not to hate her. She told them that she would always love them, no matter where she was. She apologized for walking out of their lives.

She poured her heart out into her letters. So intent was she on her writing, that she did not notice Regan come in, set her food down, watch her for a moment then walk out. She only looked up when she smelled the food a few moments later. She finished Jayden's letter, sealed it, and placed it with the other two she had finished before taking a short break to eat.

She made short work of her food and was soon back to writing. This one, to her parents.

She begged her parents to forgive her for the heartache she had caused them.

I know this will come as a shock, she wrote, but I am in love with a knight. Kevin. And I simply cannot marry Prince Garrett.

She went on to say how she loved them, but she had to follow her heart. She wrote how she would forever cherish the memories of how she grew up and that she hoped to raise her own children the same way someday. As she said her good-byes, her eyes filled and a tear splashed onto the paper, smearing her name.

'Now is not the time for that,' She thought as she sat up stiffly and wiped her eyes. 'You still have the hardest one to do, so be strong!'

She took a new sheet of parchment and began.

Dearest Samantha,

I write this with a heavy heart, for I know I am about to break yours. What you feared has come to pass. I have decided to follow my heart, and I am leaving with Kevin. By the time you read this, we will be gone. I can not tell you where we are going, for I know my father would come after me at the slightest clue. And you, in your sweetness and love, would immediately tell him if I were to explain where we are headed.

You remember how difficult it is for us to say good-bye every time we must part ways? I find that this letter is the most difficult of all, for I cannot guarantee that we will meet again. The very thought hurts me more than I can say, for you have been the sister I never had, my Bestiful, for my whole life. Losing you will surely be the same as losing a piece of myself. I will miss you with everything in me.

I beg your forgiveness, my wonderful Samantha, for the hurt I know I am causing you. It kills me to know that I will not be able to stand beside you upon your wedding day, or hold your children when you have them. You will surely be a wonderful mother. Please do not hold this against me. Would you not do the same, if Eric asked you to go?

Oh, my dearest friend, how I wish I could hold onto my family and my love at the same time! But it would seem that my destiny is leading me away from here, away from all of you. Please understand my position, I am begging you. This is the hardest choice I have ever had to make.

But, alas it has been made. Give my love to Eric. I am sorry.

All my Love,

Aideen