Is it love? or is it ecstasy.

The Beginning

Y/NS POV  [TW ABUSE MENTIONS OF SELF HARM & RASICAL SLURS]

"My love" My mother started "you need to realize that women that so call love you doesn't love you angel" i started to cry in my mother shoulders "look at what she did to you.." i never wanted to believe the fact the person i love the most abuses me...i mean yea she beats me from time to time but its because i open my mouth, i don't do shit right, and I'm crazy. right? as my mom kisses my bruises on my arms and cheek she starts to tear up "im not letting you walk out that door and just forgiver her. she has done enough to my baby."

my mama brings me some on my favorite food Mac & cheese  "thank you mama but..i love her and i can't leave her" my mama sighs at my reply "My sweet baby, she surely didn't love you when she cheated on you and left you on the beach on valentines day. You need to let her go you are gonna find someone who actually loves you all of you and when you have your disagreements shes not gonna lay one finger on you. you don't deserve what you are getting right now you deserve someone who cares." shes right shes always right. "okay mama im sorry mama i didn't-" i choke on my words "i didn't mean to disappoint you" my mom hold my in her arms like I'm a baby "oh mi amor..you never and never will disappoint me" my mama kisses my head and makes me a Epsom salt bath and tea. I love my mom

2 months later

I'm finally free. a week after the night of finally talking to my mother about my abuse with my ex wife i broke up with her and I'm divorcing her next month i also reported my abuse to the police and shes in jail 25 year sentence. god when i heard those words come out of that judges mouth me and my whole family jumped and cried tears of joy. i was finally free i was able to be walk around without being yelled at, i was able to go places without being harassed and tracked and i was able to be myself without getting beat on.

"Aye mama" I kiss my mothers forehead "let me help you clean okay?" My mom shakes her head no "mama no all you do is work let me help you." My mom kisses her teeth "no no go out make some friends because your ass have none." My mother laughs "ha ha ha so funny mother" I chuckle "but for real mama let me help you" my mom rolls her eyes and that mean yes in her language "yesss" I help my mom clean the dishes and mop the floor and she looks at me with worried concerned eyes "what mama?" My mom sighs "it's just that- ever since court day you haven't tried to make any friends...it's scary I don't want you to go insane like your grandma" I smile "mama I got you and fatty (little brother) that's enough friends for me" my mama smiles and kiss my cheek "still I want you to have friends. Me and fatty are not always gonna be there yk." God I hate when she says this type of stuff even if she's right I don't wanna hear about that.
"Mama please not this convo again" my mom nods and goes back to folding the clean towels "I know amor but it's true my ass aint go be here for long im fucking 43 whew that was hard to say." I chuckles at my moms crazy ass "okay mama I'll make some new friends just for you but first ima start my business." My mom smiles "FINALLY WHEN?!?" I shrug "idk mama tbh idk how" my mom starts to thinks "OH YOU KNOW THAT UH UHHH WHATS THAT SHIT CALLED" I look at her confused "UH TIKTACK..RICKRACK.." I laugh "you mean tiktok" my mama snaps at me "YES THAT POST YOUR DESIGNS ON THERE" my eyes widen "oh shit your right!" "I always am." I flip her off and she does it back "now go start now we done anyways "OKAY MAMA" I run upstairs and get to working

A week later

So it's been a week and I got so much more follows I was at 100 followers now I'm at 21.3k and I'm happy about that. it's a big step. So many people have been telling me I'm amazing at my work and I should keep going which I love and some people have been saying I suck and have no creativity which is a straight up lie.

"Y/NNN" that's probably my mama. i run downstairs and see the most beautiful food on the table "thank you mama i was getting hungry" my mom nods i randomly get a call from my best friend kali uchis "MAMA KALI IS CALLING" kali is my moms favorite friend of mine well..only friend of mine. Its sad because she lives so far away from me so we cant see eachother no more