Unconditionally Bae

11. I'm not gay

Monday came around faster than I wanted it to. I went straight to class and Shane found me there. We exchanged pleasantries when he sat next to me and that was it. The guy really knew me.

We had three classes on Mondays and Tuesdays, two on Wednesday and Friday and one on Thursday. We had to be in the clinic from Wednesday to Friday. I had a shift in the library every weekday except Thursday and for once I was glad I had such a busy schedule.

Fiona was the one that had gotten me the job and I was very grateful. It helped me earn some pocket money and I got unlimited access to books that I wouldn’t get to if I didn’t work there.

That Monday I stayed out late, I even walked Fiona back to her room just so I could find Shane asleep. If there was one thing that was reliable, it was Shane’s sleeping schedule. He had to sleep on or before ten if we had a seven O’clock class, otherwise, he would have a hard time waking up and we had those classes every day.

I quietly snuck into the room. The lights were out and he was in bed. I went and had my shower but when I got out of the bathroom, he was sitting on his bed. I almost fell on my ass from the shock.
“What the fuck Shane, you scared me,” I said after he switched on the lights.

“I was waiting for you. I’m sorry if I scared you,”

“Shouldn’t you be asleep? We have an early class tomorrow,”

“I wanted us to talk,”

“We have nothing to talk about,”

“We have to talk about what happened on Friday-

“If it’s about the fight, I’m good. I already told you that,”

“I’m talking about what happened at Ryan’s place-

“We were both drank and drank people do stupid things,”

“I wasn’t drank and neither were you,”

“Maybe you weren’t but I was and that’s why whatever happened, happened. If I was sober I wouldn’t have let it go that far…I mean I wouldn’t have let it happen. If that’s all, I need to sleep,” I said and got in my bed, “I would also appreciate it if you kept it to yourself and not talk about it anymore,”

He had this look in his face that made me feel like I was breaking his heart and that was the last thing I wanted. I sat up and faced him, “I don’t know what you expected to hear from me but I’m not gay Shane. It was just…”

“But you kissed me,”

“And I regret it. I shouldn’t have done that. I’m not gay Shane,”

“

Are you trying to convince me or yourself? You enjoyed every minute of it just like I did,”

“So what if I enjoyed it? That doesn’t mean I’m gay. I’m a healthy, young male adult with sexual needs and you just happened to be there to fulfil them,”

“Just so you know, straight men do not enjoy head from other men,”

“What do you want from me Shane? Do you want me to return the favour? Will that get you to leave me alone?”

“I don’t want you to return the favour. I want you to acknowledge that you did enjoy yourself,”

“I did, is that all?”

“No,”

“What more do you want?”

“If you want, we could do so on a regular basis,” that sentence had me dumbfounded. I looked at him, unable to hide the shock displayed on my face. Was he serious? Nothing about his facial expression said otherwise,