Healing Hearts

Chapter Three

The sharp blade placed over my skin, wanting so badly to just press a little harder and cut the surface, closing my eyes and letting out a strangled scream, I couldn't do it, as much as I wanted to slit my wrists I just couldn't the image of Jake flashing before me made me stop, I knew that I couldn't do it, I couldn't leave dad alone and I wouldn't do that to him, I couldn't hurt him any more than I had done.

I made my way back into the kitchen after splashing some cold water over my face, hoping the heat would fade out soon or that I didn't have a bruise, I didn't want to look in the mirror because I still wasn't ready to see that reflection.

The room was empty so I went and opened the fridge, no surprise when all I could see was the wine bottles, I grabbed the bowl of food dad had made and pulled it out, placing it in the microwave as I heated up the pasta bake.

I didn't eat much, I really wasn't very hungry, just more so doing it to keep dad happy so he didn't have to worry about that as well.

I got into bed and checked my phone a new message from Jasper is everything ok at home?

Could be better, wish the night was over already.

sweet dreams Tessa, hopefully of your favourite teacher! ha

I replied back to him goodnight and you wish! Xx

It was around 2am when I woke up, not fully understanding what woke me up, I looked over and looked at dad who was fast asleep next to me, lightly snoring and completely out like a light, it was rare for him to have a good night sleep, but when he finally did he snored like a train.

The sound of a door nearby opening made my heart race, then the of so familiar sound of that door opening with a the same little creak, that door hadn't been touched since Jake died and only one person in this house was in it, loud banging from his sliding wardrobe coming from the room made a surge of adrenaline rush throughout my body.

No she can't be, she couldn't be doing that.

I opened the bedroom and tip toed quietly over the carpeted rug down the hall to find mum in Jake's room with a heap of garbage bags, my eyes widening as I realised what was now happening, she was clearing out his things, throwing them away as if he didn't exist any more.

“stop” I shouted as I pushed his door open further, slightly slamming it in the wall with a loud thud, the handle rattling slightly.

Her bloodshot eyes snapping to mine and giving me a dirty glare, ignoring me as she went to go back through his things, I wasn't going to let her do this, just because she was mad didn't give her the right to throw a hissy fit and get rid of his things.

“this is Jake's room, get out and stop touching his things” I yelled at the top of my lungs, my voice slightly hurting as I hadn't spoken that loud in a long time, the last time was when I was screaming as I ran to my brothers lifeless body on the middle of the road.

“I'm throwing them away, this is your fault, it's all your fault he's dead, you killed him Tessa, it should have been you” she hissed stepping towards me more, her hands flailing at me, slapping me in all types of directions, knocking me to the ground as she kept hitting me, venting out all her anger out on me, I was scooting across the floor, trying to get away from her as she yelled and hit me more, her foot kicking into the sides.

I gave her legs as hard kick back as I found the smallest bit of strength in me to get her off, and with a broken wrist it wasn't easy, she stumbled slightly which gave me the chance to stand up, turning hot on my heel and running out of the bedroom.

I felt my body hitting something hard and breathing, breathing very heavily into me as the air from his nostrils blew over the side of my neck.

It should have been you. What type of parent would ever say that to their daughter?