My silver lining // jawsten

chapter one

"Another day another slay." I said sarcastically to myself, looking in my body mirror. My apartment has no other mirrors; aside from this one that my mother insisted on bringing. After her first visit she brought a bunch of home decor. I haven't even put anywhere, nor do I plan on doing so.

I further examined myself in the mirror and sighed, disappointed.

I'm wearing the same thing I wear pretty much every day: A large black hoodie with some anime boy on it, black ripped skinny jeans and my old beat up vans I used to wear when I went skating. I have grown absolutely none since my sophomore year of highschool.

Soon enough, I walked out the door. I was half expecting to be greeted by the community stray, but to my dismay, he wasn't there. I feed him sometimes that way he knows I'm a friend and won't hurt him. Without another thought about Goober, as named by my best friend Otto, I walked to the bus stop. No other way of getting to class, seeing as my piece of shit car got totaled by my drunk neighbor. And the worst part... he didn't even get a ticket for it.

The bus got here relatively early today. I pulled some cash out of my pocket and handed it to the driver, smiled before putting my head down and walked to my usual seat. Someone was sitting there though. Just my luck. I guess I'll be standing then, since no other seats are available. At one stop, a pregnant woman got on the bus, and to that poor bastards-

"Holy shit"

I must have said that out loud, causing me to earn some dirty looks. They must have thought I was saying holy shit to how far along the woman was, but no. The man that had taken my seat earlier was absolutely gorgeous. He was the most beautiful person I've ever laid eyes on. Soon enough, as if I had the worst luck in the world, the bus slammed on the breaks. I tripped forward and crashed right into the beautiful man.

"Fuck, I'm so sorry" I apologized and stared at my shoes, knowing his eyes would cause me to go weak. He didn't say anything. Great, I pissed him off already and I've never even seen him before. Thankfully my stop was next. I got off the bus as fast as possible, but he followed me.

"My name's Awsten, by the way" he said, almost as if he meant to talk to me sooner. I blushed and nodded, looking at the ground to avoid looking into his eyes; I knew for sure they'd make me melt into a puddle of rainbow gayness.

"That's a pretty cool name, my name's jawn" I said and turned to walk into the coffee house, I've been here plenty of times before and never have I ever seen this man come in here.

"Nice, mines spelt with a 'W', haha" I stopped dead in my tracks, almost shocked. I turned around and looked him in the eyes. Of course I melted, but I'd focus on that later.

"No way" I said and a smile formed on my face. He looked confused until I said "so is mine!" Enthusiastically. He smiled as well, and began to walk.

"Well, jawn, looks like we have more in common than I thought" he said and I followed him into the small shop. Once we got inside I had expected him to sit at another table, but when we ordered our drinks, he sat at mine.

"So..." I struck up conversation, avoiding his eyes again after finally solidifying from my liquid gay goop form. "why... Why did you sit with me?" I asked, hoping to not hurt his feelings by he statement. To my complete and utter surprise he smiled, causing my legs to go weak and eyes to dart all over the room until landing back on his perfect lips.

"Well, I have no other friends in the area" he said and took a sip of his hot salted caramel latte. I smirked.

"So...I'm your friend now, huh?" I asked and he blushed. I wasn't expecting that; he gave off such a confident vibe.

"I-I mean, if you want to be" he said, and fidgeted with his bracelets. He had three, a green, orange and red one.

"of course I do!" I semi-shouted, a little too enthusiastic. He looked up at me and smiled, then he spoke. he was completely disregading my excitement and that caught me off guard. I didn't mind though, I was relieved he didn't make fun of me for it.

"Why don't you make eye contact?" My smiled faded into a resting face and I looked at my hands that were currently both around my coffee.

"I mean... I do, just-" I paused, trying to think of the right word to use. My brain must have malfunctioned and instead of saying anything else i said, "not with you" Awsten frowned and I panicked.

"Why-" I cut him off, babbling my ass off trying to comfort him for being an asshole on accident.

"Fuck i- sorry I mean- I didn't mean it like that I just" I inhaled and in a long ass run on sentence blurted out. "you're just the most beautiful boy I've ever met and your eyes are beautiful I melt and gay and fuck..." He laughed his fucking ass off. I was blushing; my face as red as a Dr. Pepper can.

"Oh my god! I knew it!" He yelled, making heads turn in the almost empty coffee shop. I blushed harder and everything got hot, but he just smiled.

"Knew what?" I mumbled. He smirked and grabbed one of my hands from my coffee and put his slightly larger hand on top of mine.

"That you were gay" Awstens voice was soft as he spoke. I blushed harder, becoming one big ketchup bottle. Everything got blurry for a while with all the blood in my body rushing to my face

"Okay, so what?" I asked and he smiled. I looked into his eyes again and this time I stayed calm. I expected him to be grinning but he smiled sweetly.

"No, nothing. Just... Same" a light blush brushed over his cheeks as well. I so badly wanted to kiss his perfect lips. Awsten brushed some of medium length silver hair out of my face. I smiled at him, not knowing what else to do.

"Okay, my turn to ask questions" i said,  trying to gain some more confidence. It didnt work how I wanted it to though, so I avoided the mans features, eyes focused on our hands.

"Okay, what do you wanna know?" He asked and I glanced up. I laced our fingers together feeling as if we had known each other for a lifetime. It was an odd feeling, but it felt natural for some reason.

"Well for starters.... Where are you from? You said you weren't used to this area" I said and took a sip of my coffee, awaiting his beautiful voice to erupt into an answer.

"First of all, I said I had no freinds in the area. But yeah, I am not from around here. Texas is a scrappy place" I looked at his face and noticed he was looking at our intertwined hands. He ran his thumb over mine and I spoke again.

"Oh, so you don't even come from Texas?" Before he could speak I added to my sentence. "But that's not what I asked, where are you from?" He smiled and finished off the coffee he had been sipping on this whole time.

"Well, I come from a place not far from here, but in a way, it's years away" thinking that he was talking about some old timey place, I let it go. He obviously didn't want to tell me, so I didn't push the issue too far.

"So... Since we're freinds now" I started. He smiled and finished my sentence.

"Wanna take this back to your place?" I blushed again and nodded. I didn't know what he was hinting at, but I had a sneaking suspicion.