Just In Time (The Santa Clauses)

A Little Bit Better

"I did bring some orange juice that I do want you to drink to get your blood pressure up " . Unzipping her bag, Olivia pulled out a small container of orange juice she had probably gotten from the cafeteria. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" We moved just beyond the doors to the hall. "Is there any reason to believe she could be cutting again?"

"I wish I knew. She's been avoiding me and Dr. Wilder since our meeting last week. She skipped her meeting on Friday and didn't check in with me this morning. Her dad did get her to let the doctor make sure it wasn't too deep but after that she shut down."

"Any idea what to do next?"

"I can try to talk to her again, but sometimes I feel like it just makes things worse."

"When you were filling me in, you told me you were the first to realize she had been cutting. I can't imagine she would've told you if she didn't trust you. You've made some kind of connection that no one else has. Admitting you've been doing something you're not supposed to --especially someone in authority where she could get in trouble takes some level of trust. I'm still worried about her not eating. What could be causing it?"

"I don't know. That may take a little while to figure out. I have some snacks back in my office. I may have her eat lunch with me if this continues."

"That may not be a bad idea. Her blood pressure was a little low. It's hard to tell without a blood test but I'm going to take a wild guess this isn't the first time she's done this." She looked back at Mira who had moved to the bench. "I'll come back to your office to make sure her blood pressure is back up before she leaves."

"Hey, how are you feeling?" Olivia walked back towards her. I hung back a little so they could talk.

"Better."

"Good. You look like you're feeling a little bit better."

"Can I go back to class?"

"I would feel better if you ate something. When I checked your blood pressure, it wasn't super low but enough that we don't feel comfortable letting you go until it comes back up."

"I have something in my office." I chimed in, agreeing with everything Olivia just said. "We can talk on the way." Mira got up, throwing the container from a ways straight into the garbage can. Olivia and I shared a look of amazement.

"You know you have a good arm," Olivia told Mira as we passed the hall where Dr. Wilder's office was located. I made a mental note to talk to him later. "Do you play any sports?"

"I'm not really a sports person."

"Well, we could use someone like you on the volleyball team if you were." The only noise was the slight rustling of my coat until we reached the front office. "I'll check up on you in a little bit."

"Thanks, Olivia." Leading her into my office, I reached into my cabinet and pulled out a basket full of peanut butter crackers, trail mix, and pretzels that students could have if they needed something. "I need you to eat something for me." Mira looked at me blankly, crossing her hands over her chest as she eyed the basket warily.

"I'm fine."

"What I just saw was the opposite of fine. You skipped your meeting with Dr. Wilder on Friday and with me this morning. Now you passed out because you're not eating. If you're trying to get my attention, you have it." I gave the most serious look a mother could give to their child while leaning my knuckles against my desk

"You're right, I am." She said so softly, I thought I had been imagining her agreeing with me at first until she looked up at me with tears in her eyes.

"When I asked you if you were comfortable with the plan me, your dad, and Dr. Wilder were making, you looked like you were going to bolt out of the room. Why?" My voice softened as I lowered myself into the seat beside her.

"I never wanted to go in the first place." A tear slipped down her cheek, her foot swiping back and forth against the gray carpet. "He doesn't understand that I don't want to talk about my mom or my feelings. I hate it."

"While you have every right to have your feelings about what happened with your mother," I began trying to find the right way of supporting her, but also convincing her she needed help in some way I couldn't give her. "I can't ignore the fact you're cutting your wrists. So we need to come up with some kind of solution we can all work with here. That means me, you, your Dad, Dr. Wilder, and your teachers. We're all here to help you, but we can't if we don't know what it is you want."

"Oh."

"What is it that you want out of being here?"

"I don't know."

"I think you do or you wouldn't be trying to get my attention."

"You remind me a lot of my mom," Mira stated, talking down to the ground. " I could only talk to her."

"I'm honored you're trusting me. It sounds like you trusted her a lot." Squeezing her eyes shut, a look of deep hurt crossed her expression.

"She was the best listener."

"If the person you talked to is no longer here, who are you talking to now?" I knew I was asking all the hard questions—important things that needed to have never been asked when I saw her face crumble with anguished tears.

"She was supposed to stay here with my dad, with me, with Seth." Mira balled her fist up tightly as she sobbed. "She wasn't supposed to leave. I didn't want her to leave!"

"Come here." I wrapped one hand around the front of her and one in the back so my arms were stretched around so both hands interlocked at her side. Her whole body trembled with each sob until she had no more left in her— the room stilling as she worked on catching her breath again. I let go when I knew she had calmed down a little, still staying beside her.

"Hey," Olivia called softly, taking in the scene before her as she gently touched the teenager's arm. "I just came back to check Mira's blood pressure. Feeling any better?"

"A little." Her words were barely audible as she allowed Olivia to place the cuff around her right arm.

"Your blood pressure has risen a little. Still not near where I want it to be." Olivia's gaze fell towards the basket sitting near her on my desk. "Have you eaten anything yet?"

"No."

"We started heading in that direction, but ended up having a much-needed conversation." I told her, grabbing the basket and pulling it into my lap "That will be the next thing we'll work on doing."

"Good. Mira, I want to check your blood pressure before you leave school today." Olivia verified as I held the basket out to Mira. "Keep me updated."

"Thank you," I told her in passing as she took off back towards her own office. Mira slowly combed through the basket, finally settling on a bag of pretzels. She opened it and popped one into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully.

"How long do I have to stay here?" She questioned, her fingers grasping another pretzel as she waited for another response. Instead of my initial response of words, I held a finger up, picking up my phone.

"Hey, Brock," I told my assistant who was back now after a brief illness. "Can you clear my schedule until further notice?" Mira sunk back into the chair, knowing that was my answer. "Thank you."