New Beginning

Chapter 4: Unsettled Felling's

What's wrong with me, Why did I react like that? 

I can't possibly be jealous, can I? Ooh no, This can't be happening, I fell for him didn't I, What am I going to do, what am I talking about there is nothing to do, I can't fall in love with the person a find the most annoying in the group (ex-group) and so what if I have some feelings for him, I can't be with him, besides his dating that girl, what her name again, Quincy? Quinn yeah, that is it and she is like ten times more pretty than me, even though I hate to admit it. 

According to my five years of experience knowing Alex have only seen him dating the prettiest girls there are and I don't think I can describe myself as that, besides he would never have feelings for me, All I have to do is get over whatever feelings I had for him before things got weird and awkward, But I wonder why he started dating again the last relationship he was in was like 1 year ago or somewhat close so why is he suddenly dating again?

Do you like Alex?" Quinn asked, " What, of course not, Alex and I are just friends." I lied. I wouldn't have to lie anymore. what am feeling for him would be gone soon anyway. I thought to myself  

      "That's a relief because the way you just sound I thought you might have feelings for him but am glad you don't because I like him and I don't want anyone to get in the way." She said smiling or something that looked like smiling. "Am glad you like him, and you mentioned you wanted to use the restroom," I said to end the conversation and to be alone. " I don't want to anymore, you should probably get dressed for the party." She said smiling. 

Oh right, the party, I forgot

"Sorry I don't think I can come with you guys, you should go without me," I said eager to be alone. 

" Alright then, your lost."

  "And that's how I ended up in my living room hotel watching TV alone and eating the food Alex got me. He tried convincing me to come with them which was super annoying even when he fully understood how much I hate parties. I might end up despising parties if I end up going with that girl, I just hate that smiling face of hers, I have the creeping feeling that under that smile she makes, there is a different person under it, Or maybe it's just my imagination or another jealous situation. 

I still can't believe I fell in love with that guy, what do I even like about him? His kinda of cute I will give him that. Is not like I am into cute guys. Now that I am thinking about it, I have never thought of having a type, Even though I dated two to three guys before. I guess I just said yes to whoever guys asked me out. Normally the guys are kindhearted, hot, and romantic but after I got to know them, They changed. Completely. So why do I have feelings for him all of a sudden? I can't say he's romantic because he's not, I don't think have ever seen that part of him before and sweet, maybe sometimes, when he's not getting on my nerves, but I see he stopped, maybe he cools off and started acting nice with me when they died.

Maybe that's what happened. I fell for him or at least that is what I thought, I probably thought I liked him like that because he started acting nice and sweet, and since he never acted that way toward me before. I take that kindness as love.

 I can't just sit here alone doing nothing when they're out there having fun. Maybe I should just go ahead and see the bridge by myself I don't need him to take me anyway, Yeah that's a good plan, I should go get dressed but what can I wear to somewhere like that it is my first time exploring the new environment. should I dress descend, normal, or just go all out?