Broken. ↠ An Outsiders FanFic || on hold

00|| Introduction;Dear Diary

Picture of Allison Above^

Dear Diary,
Hi. Well, this is my first time writing in this diary. I always thought diaries were just worthless, nothing really special. But I soon change my perspective when I realized I don't feel like telling people how I felt or what happens in my dull life, so I decided to write everything in here. So here goes nothing. I always had a good life, nice friends, an amazing family, being liked by mostly everyone I guess. Everything change about 4 years ago, when my life took an unexpected turn, changing everything. My best friend-well now ex-best friend,Amanda-decided she didn't want to be friends with me. She decided she rather be with the popular crowd than me. She instantly changed, and started bullying me, along with her other friends. I don't know what I ever did to her but she decided to do all these things to make me feel like I don't belong. I can't really describe why or how she changed, it just happened, It was fifth grade when she left me to go with them. It wasn't just her that change. My parents got a divorced during the same time AMANDA left me. Then a few months later my mom got a boyfriend, and also got a better job. I didn't really like her boyfriend that much. Whenever my mom was at work, he would go out to a club or something, leaving me and my brother home alone. He would usually come back drunk, and beat the living hell out of me, calling me every name in the book. My brother on the other hand didn't get abused, I don't know why, but he just didn't. I love my brother, but he didn't do anything to stop my mother's boyfriend from abusing me. I tried telling my mother but she never listened. I also started to cut at the time, As the years past, the bullying got worse, my mothers boyfriend beatings got worse, I lost all my friends, and my brother barley talks to me. Then, two years ago, my mom married that bastard, who is now considered my 'Step-Father'. So now, when he gets the chance he beats me until I can't even stand. I tried telling my mom again, but she won't listen. The cutting got worse also. After four years of being called every name in the book and beat senseless, I believe I have no reason to still be on this earth. I believe that I'm a worthless piece of trash. I must of over exaggerated when I said I had NO friends, well I have only one you see. Her name is Aria. I tell her about mostly well...everything, and she tells me to tell someone about it. But the thing is I can't. That's why I'm writing in here. I have depression, also. It also gotten worse. All my positive thoughts went down the drain. The thing is being through all this I feel everyone hates me. So why should I be here if no one cares? I tried to kill myself but I just couldn't do it for some odd reason. I hate going outside, where people are to laugh in your face, call you names, and even beat you up. I'm broken. And no one could fix me. So whoever is reading this my name is Allison Monroe, a broken girl that can never be fixed. So why try to help?. Don't try to get close to me or you'll just get hurt. I'm sorry for being alive. I'm just sorry for being on this earth. Im sorry for everything about me. Just try not to fix me, okay? It's not worth it.

Signed,
Allison Monroe