Important authors note at the end so please read.
Previously on Optimism-
"Please say something." He pleads pulling away slightly so that he has a full view of my face.
" I honestly have no idea what to say." I laugh nervously shaking my head.
" Say you'll be mine."
"Please Autumn, I want to be so much more than just fuck buddies. I want you to be mine, I want every single piece of you to be all mine." He says taking my hands in his and I search his eyes for any signs of lying
" I...I don't know how to love Harry, love is something I haven't been exposed to since my brother left, and i'm afraid...i'm afraid that I'm going to get hurt." I confess looking at my feet.
" Then let me show you what love is, you just have to say yes." He cups my cheek in his hand rubbing his thumb over my lips.
" Okay." I whisper just loud enough for only him to hear.
"Oh petal, you just made my dreams come true, shit that sounds unmanly." He exclaims happily and I laugh.
" C'mon lets go back and cuddle and shit or we could finish what we started earlier." He winks and I wrinkle my nose in mock disgust.
" You are gross." I say playfully. I wouldn't mind though.
" Harry I'm glad you two have come to an agreement." Elliot's voice booms from behind us making me jump up in surprise.
"Were you listening the whole time." I ask my cheeks a bright shade of red.
" No, I only heard the last part." He grins at me.
" We are going to go, make sure to take care of him." Harry says flicking his head to the disgusting man laying on the ground behind us.
" Yeah I'll take care of him, I can't have him trying to hurt your girl." He says genuinely and I smile at him kindly.
" Oh and Harry don't forget your job, it needs to be done next week." He says sternly and Harry nods.
" What 'job' was he talking about?" I ask curious, I want to learn more about this whole gang thing so I can better understand him.
" It's nothing you need to worry about petal, it's just some issue we have with another gang that needs to taken care of." He says grabbing my hand as we walk towards the exit, I ignore all the wolf whistles and glares from the half naked girls and focus on Harry's hand holding mine. Why did he even join a gang in the first place?
" Is there a reason why you even joined a gang?" I ask carefully as I don't want him to get angry and lash out, I know he would never hurt me physically but after watching him almost kill that repulsive man there is a small part of me that is afraid he will one day.
" Yes there was, but can we not talk about it right now." He says tensing up. What is he hiding?
" I just want to understand the whole gang thing better, so I'm not completely clueless, like what even is the name of the gang?" I ask as we get in his car.
" I don't want you involved in this Autumn, you could get hurt and I would never forgive myself if you did." He says slowly.
"Can you at least tell me what the name is?" I push further, I'm usually not a nosy person but I just can't wrap my head around this whole thing.
" The Shamrocks." He sighs and rolls his wrist around so I can see a tiny shamrock tattoo. I can't believe I've never noticed that before.
" Once we join and pass initiation you are required to get the tattoo." He says closing his eyes. I remember Abi telling me Niall has a tiny shamrock tattoo on his left shoulder blade..the same one Harry has.
" Is Niall also in the gang?" I conclude looking over at him with wide eyes. Does Abi know?
" Yes." He replies turning on the car driving down the old and abandoned building.
"Does Abi know?"
" I'm not sure actually, but if she doesn't let Niall be the one to tell her." He shrugs looking over at me briefly then back to the road.
" I'm sorry that I'm bringing you into this mess, I would completely understand If you want nothing to do with me now." He says sadly and I scoff making him look over at me with a mix between confused and sad look.
" Seriously if I wanted to leave you I wouldn't have risked my health going out in the damn pouring rain without shoes or a coat to tell you that I have feelings for you."
" I don't understand you Autumn." He shakes his head and turns onto the road where our apartments are.
" And I don't understand you Harry." I reply once we are parked outside our apartments.
" Goodbye Harry, thanks for the ride." I smirk opening the door getting out of the car before he could lock it. I hear him groan and just because I make sure to sway my hips as I walk to my apartment. Not even a second later I hear footsteps and a pair of strong arms wrap around my waist.
" You aren't getting away that easily petal." He whispers in my ear picking me up and carrying me to his apartment and back to his room. He sets me down on his bed and looks at me hungrily.
" Stay here." He says sternly. " And take off your shirt too." He smirks and leaves the room. Disregarding his request I get up from his bed to look around his room. I go over to his nightstand and open the drawer revealing its contents; condoms, papers, a pill bottle? I take out the bottle and read the label.
Haldol 100mg
Prescribed for Harry E. Styles
Take once daily
I remember reading about Haldol... It's used for schizophrenia...Harry has schizophrenia , I guess that explains the voices and his extreme moodiness. I continue to root through the drawer until I pull out what I fear the most....a gun.
Oh no.
A/N There are many symptoms of schizophrenia and I decided for Harry to only posse a few of them purely to go with the story, SO DON'T ARGUE WITH ME!!! okay serious authors note over
How are you guys doing? I'm currently in my History final rn BUT i only have two more finals left and then Summer Yayayayayayayy idek vote and comment maybe soooo yeah okay byees.
I'll be there yeah you know it, to fix you with love.
MariahXx
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Optimism//h.s
Fanfiction"If I ever win you," He said anger bright in his pale green eyes, " It will be because you wanted me more." He knew for certain that she belonged forever in his arms, just as he knew she didn't realize it yet. THIS BOOK WILL CONTAIN MATURE MATERIAL
