Tales of a Heart ▪︎ Anthony Bridgerton

✵SIXTEEN✵

N e w b e g i n n i n g s

I opened my eyes, the sunlight hitting me making me close my eyes once again. After a minute, I gasped, sitting up in realization, bringing the blankets up to my chest. I looked down at Anthony, who was sleeping peacefully, observing his form.

I was consumed with thoughts, everything we did, everything I allowed him to do, coming back to me. I huffed frustrated, picking up my clothes and putting them back on as quickly as i can.

Tears stung my eyes as i realized what I had to do. I could not be with him, I cannot hurt Edwina more, and break what little of affection she still has for me. I cannot completely ruin my family, or let Anthony ruin his by being with me, not when i knew the ton would create even more scandals concerning both families.

Not to mention that I gave myself to him. I cannot be with him, and any other gentleman will not want me when they come to know I am not 'pure'

I bent down to where Anthony was laying, kissing his lips softly "I am deeply, truly, sorry, my love" I whispered, sparing him one last glance before leaving back to Lady Danbury's home.

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I entered my bedchamber quietly after changing into my sleepwear. I successfully got to the house carefully, no one saw me entering the house or in the streets. I am certain my family thinks I got home not too long from them last night.

I laid down on my bed, tears falling from my face as I cried quietly. I don't know how long I spent like that, but before i knew it, a knock on my door snapped me out of my thoughts.

I sat up, wiping away my tears as the door opened. Anthony walking in and shutting the door. He let out a breath before coming to stand in front of me. We stared at one another silently, observing.

"I want to apologize" He spoke up, breaking the silence "You deserve so much more than that" I stayed quiet, letting him speak

"I took liberties. I... I do not regret what we did but i did not want it to happen like that, so... I came to apologize-"

"Yes, you already said that-" I nodded cutting him off

"And to ask you to marry me." I looked at him shocked "Y/n, I'm here, and I'm asking-" He took out a ring box from his pocket and opened it, I shook my head quickly

"I do not need you to ask me anything at all!" i spoke up quickly

"Y/n, i-"

"I cannot marry you, Anthony" I cut him off sadly, my eyes filling up with tears once again, he stared at me confused "I...I wish nothing more than to be yours, truly, but it is not possible"

"Why not?" He said desperately "It does not matter what everyone else thinks, as long as we lo- care for each other"

"I care about what my family thinks. i care about what my sisters think." i sighed "I care about whether or not I am harming your family's reputation, or my own family's reputation, i care that if i accept being with you, the ton will think that something was wrong with Edwina if you decided to switch from one sister to another and thus making her undesirable for any other gentleman" I sniffle

"And what about you?" Anthony hummed "What about what you want? What about your happiness? Is your happiness not important?"

"It does not matter what I want, my family comes above everything, even myself, and I will do everything I can so they will not get ruined" I looked down at my lap "Even giving up my own happiness for them, so please, do not insist any longer" I clear my throat