Biker Baby

Twenty-Four

~Chapter Twenty-Four~

Oh my god!
Holy shit!
Oh god!
I just shot someone.
The gun falls from my hands as the man drops to the ground and Kendra jumps away.
I just killed someone.
'I - I'm sorry' I stutter looking at the man's unmoving form 'I didn't know- I didn't know what to - what to do' tears prick my eyes.
'Scar' Sam says softly, I look and see him slowly, cautiously coming toward me.
'Is he-' I close my eyes not wanting to say it. 'is he dead?' I finally ask.
I watch as Jacob bends down and checks a pulse.
'Sorry Scarlett' he says softly. Sam catches me and we both drop to the ground.
'I killed a man' I sob. I know he was a bad man but it doesn't make it ok for me to kill him. 'I'm sorry'
'Shh, it's OK, you had no choice' Sam says soothingly while rocking me and keeping my head in his chest. 'Get rid of him' he tells the others. I guess everyone else took off when I fired the gun.
I sit there crying for the loss of a man I didn't know. A man who had hurt my family and if it wasn't me who had actually shot him then I wouldn't care, I would shrug it off because that's what these guys are. They protect their family and they take care of the bad men threatening their family but it's not me.
He was nothing of the innocence but I was. Was. I can't help the guilt clawing at me. I took a life. I'm tainted with evil now.
'Take her to the cabin, she needs time to deal with this' I hear Kendra say gently.
'I know Ma' Sam whispers. He still rocks me as I cry in his chest.
I cry harder knowing that I'm crying for a man who hurt my family. I feel like an idiot crying for his death. At least it proves I'm guilty right? Proves I'm not cold hearted and proves I'm not a killing machine. I'm not cut out to kill people.
'Come on' Sam says. 'Let's get you out of here'

~~~~~

I've stopped crying now but I haven't stopped feeling guilty.
'I'm proud of you' Sam says. I frown. He's proud of me? Proud that I killed someone?
'I shot someone Sam' I snap. 'I killed a man, how can you be proud of me?'
'Because you did it to save my mother. No one else would have been brave enough to take a shot but you did. You shot that man to help my mother and I am proud of that even if you didn't intend to kill him'
'No, I just wanted to knock him enough to get Kendra away and someone else finish him off' I look back out the window and i already know we're nearly at the cabin.
'I know' he says in understanding. 'My first kill went the same way. I, of course, knew how to use the weapon though. I shot him in the back but hit an artery in spine and killed him. He was meant to be alive for questioning. I know how you're feeling Scarlett, I've been there'
'Does it ever stop?' I ask.
'The guilt?' I nod my head 'No, every life you take the guilt builds up but you have to remind yourself that you're doing it for the best. That that person deserved to die and we don't kill innocent people' he explains.
'I'm not like you guys though, I can't kill people, it's not who I am. I don't even like thinking about you doing it but I know you do and I'm fine with it, I just can't be like that'
'I know but I'm going to help you through the pain and the night mares because there will be night mares' Sam tells me
Great. I'm going to have night mares about this.
Kendra has Aneika for a few days while we're at the cabin and I just want to get over this and get back to my daughter.
'I just want to get this next few days over with' I sigh.