Harvest of Love

Chapter 15

              I made it back to the farm, thanks to Clem being my chauffeur. After another week's worth of recuperating and no contact from Rebecca, I decided it was time to make my move and go to her. I cornered Clem the next morning over breakfast as to where this aunt in Frankfort lived. Clem wipes his mouth with a napkin while looking straight at me.

"Why in the world would ya need that information?"

"You know why. Come on, don't make me beg." I shove my cereal bowl away in mild irritation.

"No, I know who you want to see, but I don't know why, especially since she hasn't shown an inkling of interest in you going on two weeks now."

"I should have known it couldn't be a simple question and answer with you. And yeah, I know it's been a week and five days since Rebecca up and left. And she's not once called or wrote to ask how I'm doing since getting the shit kicked out of me for her sake, so thanks for the unnecessary reminder." I've pushed out my chair to pace in my tirade.

"Sit," Clem states calmly, then leans over to pat the chair's seat when I hesitate. In a huff, I do as he insists but cross my arms in a child-like show of defiance. "Believe it or not, son, it's you I'm concerned for. Why put yourself through more pain, more rejection? No doubt, you've been dealt a hard blow, and I don't just mean in the physical. I worry for you. Maybe it would be best to just lay low, lick your wounds, and move on."

"Is that what you would've done if it was Ellie? As I recall, you said you would have done anything for her, even risk your life to run away with her." After a moment of contemplation, Clem answers,

"No, I don't reckon I would have." I start to smile at my small victory when he interjects. "But, I was young and dumb back then. I now know better than to put all my worth into someone else."

"I'm confused. Are you saying Rebecca isn't worth the trouble?"

"Do you really think I would feel that way about my one and only granddaughter? What I'm trying to say is that maybe you two need this time apart to find your own worth. If not you, then definitely Rebecca. When you measure yourself by what others think, you'll always fall short. She needs to find her worth through God's eyes, not her peers, and not you, Mason. I'm hoping her aunt in Frankfort can lead her in that direction better than I can here, just being in the periphery of her life." I don't know what to say and sit for a moment running this through my head, trying to make sense of it. "And what about you?" Clem asks gently. "Is it pride that makes you want to confront her? Are you measuring your self-worth through her rejection? Because that is what worries me about you."

"I'm not suicidal if that's what you're worried about." I say with a smirk.

"There's a big difference from being 'not suicidal' and really living. You need to find your peace and happiness in God, not Rebecca."

"All I know, Clem, is I can't leave things the way they are . . . just dangling. I need at least closure, if not a resolution. I need to hear it from her, so either you can give me the address, or I'll find it on my own."

"We've got only one week left of the break before work starts again," Clem reminds me.

"All the more reason to help me out, so I don't waste any time," I counter. Finally, I see resignation fall over Clem's face. He pushes up from his chair and shuffles to a drawer where he pulls out an envelope. He tosses it on the table in front of me. I see it is addressed to Clem and in the top left corner, a return address to Frankfort.

            Now, knowing where to find Rebecca, I don't hesitate. I throw a few outfits into a duffle bag, thinking surely it wouldn't take more than a day or two to make her see to reason. She's just dramatic. It's crazy to think she won't be able to live her life where she was born and raised. I mean, what about the farm? She is the sole heir to it. One day, she would have to take her father's place and oversee it all, right? I can't help the hum of excitement as I scramble to collect my things. I grab a wad of cash I keep in a coffee can, and my gut gives a little clinch at having to take from my savings, but I quickly override it with the knowledge that she's worth it. I'm scanning a road map I've laid out on the table to find the quickest route when I realize Clem has said something.