Purpose (Seth Clearwater x reader)

Chapter 21

I lay awake in my bed again, not feeling like getting up to pee or eat to satisfy my growling stomach. Moonlight shined through the thin, slightly open curtains and a cool, light breeze pushes into the room from the crack in my window.

Another nightmare. The urge to jump out of my window and sprint to Seth's house just so I can snuggle up to him and have a proper sleep filled night. I just know he's sleeping like a baby right now though and I don't want to wake him just because I want his affection.

Another rumble filled the room followed by a sharp pain in my stomach. I guess I did only eat one slice of pizza in the past 24 hours. That's also probably why I'm not healing as quick due to the lack of energy I currently have.

It's not too bad. The scabs are around half way healed and the skin around is clearly still bruised.  The only difference is that instead of the bruise being deep red, it's a darker purple and yellow color. It's manageable though, and that's fine with me.

Another sharp pain stabbed my stomach and I curled in on myself. I really should go use the bathroom but, I knew that wasn't gonna happen for at least another 5 minutes.

I finally stumbled out of bed, arms wrapped around my stomach in pain and vision a little blurry.

Each step took effort and by the time I made it, my head hurt from how hard I was scrunching my eyebrows.

'What is going on with me? Where did this come from? Why do I feel so worthless? It hasn't been this bad in so long...'

I thought and mumbled to myself. The walk back from the bathroom wasn't as bad, only a lingering pain left behind. I wasn't sure what time it was but, it's around 4am if I had to guess based on the sky.

I bumped into the corner of my nightstand, wincing in pain. My eyes lingered on the nightstand drawer, debating if I should open it. I shouldn't. I know I shouldn't, but that didn't change anything.

My hand pause mid way and my teeth started to bite at the skin on my bottom lip. 'You're fine Y/n. Just go to sleep and you'll be fine.'

Is what I thought.

Two hours later and I wasn't fine. I was even more numb and sleep deprived then I was before, but that doesn't matter anymore since it's basically time to get ready for school.

I sluggishly went through my morning routine, fixed my hair into a low bun, tugging on some sweatpants, a t-shirt, and a zip up hoodie, making sure I'd be comfortable throughout the day. I was so out of it, I almost missed the last step coming downstairs.

"Woah there N/n," Dad grabbed my upper arm before I had a chance to fall. "What's got you so low energy today?"

"Couldn't sleep," I mumbled and plopped on the couch to wait for Bella.

"I think we still have some melatonin Bella used to take in the closet if you can't sleep again tonight," He suggested. The sound of footsteps made me peak over my shoulder and down comes the person I was waiting for.

"I'll think about it." Yeah, think about taking one too many. Who cares if you can't die from it.

|~~~|

If finals weren't next week, I promise you I'd be anywhere but at school right now. Remember when I said I skip on days that are way to much? Well, today's definitely one of those days.

My chemistry teacher's eyes are drilling holes into my body so I don't feel comfortable enough to sleep, the hall pass is gone so I can't leave, and I finished the assigned pages for the thick review packet so I have nothing to work on. At this point, I regret not staying home. Fuck finals.