𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 || JJK

THE FINAL LETTER

dear jungkook,

you once asked me what the stack of papers that day lay on my desk were,

i lied that it was an essay for class.

i wish you had read them then, for i'm afraid i didn't say i love you enough.

i once wrote there for you,
in case the cancer has won the battle of life.

but now,
i write this for me.

i once joked,
that i'd die first.

i hadn't known that life would be so selfish.
i hadn't known that your brother would steal your life,

not knowing that,

he had taken two lives instead of one.

you won,
you died first,

come back, will you?

i should've never let you leave,
jungkook.

you could've seen jake.

he has your eyes.
i love them
but i wish he had mine instead.

so that every time i look at our son,
i'm not reminded of how
i never kissed you goodbye.

our son is beautiful.
he has your charm.

he cries a lot,
just like his mom.

i still remember the day,
they found your body in the road.

they called me for identification.
i wasn't there for your last breath.

forgive me.

for i forgive you
for the million times i needed you,
the million times i cried.

if live alone could have saved you,
you never would've died.

in life, i loved you dearly.

in death, i love you still.

you filled an abyss,
that no one ever will.

it broke my heart to lose you,
but you didn't go alone.

for part of me went with you,
the day you left home.