the Glade

Everything's so normal

It was no special day, neither sunny nor rainy. White clouds occupied the sky almost in its entirety and the wind softly swept through the streets, between the houses.

He groaned as he stood up from the bed. His aching head was heavy and his stomach felt twisted. "Damn it" Sebastian mumbled as he picks up the almost empty vodka bottle and sets the framed picture behind it back up. On his second step towards the door, the sound of a squeezed plastic bottle makes him wince "Jesus Christ, my head". He stumbles forwards to the door and holds on for a second. One ear against the door, Sebastian checks if he can hear anything and after a couple seconds he opens the door and walks to the living room.

As expected, his dad was asleep on the couch with a beer can still in his hand. Without a sound, he places the vodka bottle on the coffee table next to him and goes to the bathroom. After one deep breath he looks up into the mirror "oh you don't look too bad". After some cold water to the face and brushing his teeth he puts on deodorant and goes back to the room. Picking up some clothes on the floor, he decides that a trip to the city could be a good idea. He smells the hoodie in his hands and decides that it's still fine, changes his shirt and boxers, throws on some dark grey cargo pants and black sneakers and writes a small note for his dad. "I went to the city, I'll be back around 6", sticks it on to his dad's forehead, grabs his backpack and leaves the apartment.

While walking out, he reaches into the backpack to get his headphones and scrolls through his phone, looking for a playlist to put on. "I should go to Mary's, I want to play the piano" he thinks to himself as he checks, when the bus will arrive on his phone. "Just missed it, great." He decides to walk for one or two bus stops, since the next bus will take 30 minutes to arrive.

"I should stop doing that, I'll end up like my dad." As he walks he moves his fingers as if there's a piano to play. "Maybe I should learn that song too." He's almost dancing his way to the bus stop by now, but as another car passes by, he abruptly stops. The bus should arrive in about 13 minutes and Sebastian decides to stay at this bus stop, sits down and takes out his phone as the overthinking takes over. To get into the mood of playing it on the piano he puts Ivy by Frank Ocean on loop. "I hope one day I find someone to love, theres so much lyrics I want to dedicate to a loved one."

After a couple minutes he stands up and goes over to the time table of the busses, in an attempt to keep his mind from thinking. "I wish I could love someone, but damn I'll probably die alone..." He laughs it off as if it's not a terrifying thought and tries to just focus on the song. "Ironic that the lyrics I relate to the most, is in a language I don't speak. "Was immer du suchst, könnt ich sein, Doch du fliеgst ohne herzuseh'n vorbеi (german for: I could be whatever you're looking for, but you fly by without looking)" like damn. Well, I guess it's also on me to approach... fuck, I'm a loser. Just focus on the song". On days like this, when he thinks to much and can't control his thoughts, he misses his mother the most. She would always listen and find encouraging words to brighten the future.

As Sebastian see's the bus aproaching to the bus stop, he stands up and reaches for the coins in his pocket. While he steps into the bus he counts them for the fifth time and hands them to the driver "to the center, please". He grabs his ticket and walks to the very back of the bus and takes a seat. His eyes gaze through everything they meet behind the dirty bus window and he just zones out. Houses, cars and people flash through his vision but with every second his thoughts drift away just a bit further. The announcement of his bus stop makes him snap back and he thinks to himself "everything's so normal". Whatever he meant with that, he stands up, yawns and rubs his right eye as he walks towards the door. It opens and he takes the step through it but instead of arriving in the city, it feels like he missed a step and there's just... nothing.