WHAT IF?

4.10.12 (years before)

There's something about trust.
Once it's broken, it's lost.
Lost forever, never to be found again.
I never knew I could be in this much pain.
Worst of all, I never knew it could be from the one I once trusted.
My father. The very one I trusted.

I was 12 years of age,
Mom had travelled to the village.
So, it was me and dad at the house.
It was afternoon, I put on a really pretty blouse.
Mom had gotten it for me.
It had such a perfect fitting on me.

I just started attaining puberty
I attained it pretty fast, my breasts grew like I was twenty.
Dad came home from wherever he went to
"My pearl, come see what I bought for you".
He called out to me
And I ran pretty fast from inside to see.

He had gotten me an underwear.
Weird.
My father got me a bra.
I thought I was mistaken when I saw it from afar.
"Come. C'mon, come try it on" he said
I felt quite uneasy, I didn't know what his mind bred.
I took it from him.. "th...thank you, dad"
I stuttered.

I collected it and made way to go inside
He stood up and came to my side.
"No, pearl. Try it on, here..
There's nothing to fear..
Let me help you, I am your father, after all".
That's right, he was my father "after all"
But do fathers fiddle with their daughters' breasts this way?
There was so much I wanted to say.
But the look, the look on his face had turned cold.
And I stood there as helpless as a toad.

I knew that day that something had been broken.
Something had been stolen.
My trust and my childhood.
I was just a 12 year old with no friends in the neighborhood.
My mother.. she was my best friend
I read stories like this, I knew how this would end.
I sobbed hard inside of me. I needed my mother.
I REALLY needed my mother.
And maybe my father too, because this wasn't him.
This can never be him.
What if mom hadn't traveled?
Would all these still have happened?
Just.. WHAT IF?