Blinded°☆°•Minsung

Not again

          °☆°Jisung's Pov °☆°

Promise him one thing? What would that be? He's not here to take my soul so what harm could he truly be? "What would that be?" I ask him hesitantly as I am not sure what he wants.

"To hear me out when the time comes, to let me finish my sentences and keep your mind open for me. Because when it comes down to it, I don't want to lose you." What is he talking about keeping my mind open and losing me?

I sit up as he is now on the edge of the bed looking away from me. "Minho, when I said a month ago that I would stay by your side,I would." I tell him before Dori comes in meowing at him.

My cats really adore Minho and I can tell he does as well by the way he scoops them up giving them more affection than what they are bargaining for. I hear Soonie meow at Minho before sitting on his side with Doongie already at his feet.

Minho really has made such a big impact on my life that it is unreal. Almost like there should be a catch but there isn't.  "Then the next question is, will you be mine? Even if it isn't until death hits us both,that it will part us"

I watch as happiness then sadness flash over his face "But is a lifetime only sadden you? What if we don't end up in the same…place?" He's worried about that?

"No,because even if we don't, I will be satisfied and hold you close in my memories. But souls that are meant to be, will see each other again." I tell him as I see his upper lip twitch.

"But what if we don't have our memories to rely on in the afterlife?" This conversation has taken a deep and dark turn. Where did we end up like this?

"Minho,I know you could be worried about that but guess what, we can't change it. We are still young, we have a long time to spend with each other if we wish to. You are enough for me"

He turns his head, throwing the key at me  before walking out of the door. Did I say something wrong? What did I do?

I chase after him, locking the door quickly as I see him sobbing on the bottom of the steps of the exit. I feel the wave of sadness coming through me as I didn't make him feel this way. Why did he hide from me?

I started to approach him until something mentally told me to stop. He sucks in a breath in a heart wrenching way before he cries again. "Why him? Why did I have to fall for him? I vowed I never would..damn it." He gets up from the stair step as I quietly step back until he can't see me.

He begins to kick the wall over and over "Why must I feel human emotions like this again? Why must I put myself through so much pain and suffering? Why can't things go for us rather than away? Why must he like me? Why? Why? WHY?" He screams before crumbling down to his knees as I feel my own tears dripping down my face.

What does he mean when he says human emotions? What don't I know? "I don't need to feel love,not again. I should have left his life before he had a chance to get attached and now I will be the one to carry on this love when he dies. How is this fair?"

I want to get the courage to move,to do something,anything but I can't. My legs won't carry me anywhere, but my heart is pulling myself to him.

"Why did I agree to be the one to bring him his final goodbye? It's breaking me already as it is. How would I even say it to him? Good luck in the afterlife and I can only have 30 days if you want to decide but it won't matter because it's decided already for you before I met you? That I knew this heartbreaking fate but never could walk away because of your personality brings me to you?"

"I love this man and yet I'm torturing him. I'm wasting his remaining life and I feel happy about it. Moving in with him? No. I can't, he needs to be with a mortal and not-" I run down the stairs wrapping my arms around his shoulders.

               •♡Minho's Pov♥︎•

I feel his arms wrap around my shoulders as my instinct is to hold onto him tight with my hand and sob but I can't. I have to act strong as if nothing happened. I stand up pushing him away before walking down that last flight of stairs.

I don't look back as I head out the stairway because this is the final way to say goodbye, to let me be the asshole this time around. Please don't come back, Jisung,if you know what's good for you please.

I felt so at home with him, he made my heart warm again, he made me feel like I belong again but most of all, he gave me something I hardly remember much anymore myself, love. But I gotta throw it out, for his sake.

"LEE MINHO." I hear Jisung scream through his sobs. You know mortals can still hear you,you fool. Such a silly fool. Tears keep on dripping down my face with a slight smile.

"Don't you fucking run away from this you coward. You call yourself a grim reaper? A guide of death? You can't even guide yourself through love."  Wait, he knows? No, he sure didn't hear it from me,Right?

I turn around as seeing him crying is only making the emotions intensify. "Don't. Please go. If you know, do what is best for you. Go." I whisper before he shakes his head walking closer to me. Both of our eyes are bloodshot as we look into each other's eyes.

"Go? Go? Is that how you treat someone you love?" He tries to smile but fails miserably. "Do I know what is good for me? Because if I did, the moment you tried to use hypnosis on me, I knew you were because my mother is one as well. How do you think my mother will feel when he dies?" Jisung's voice is so shaky.

"Like shit. Like something you shouldn't put up with, that you shouldn't have put up with. Because in the end, I don't want you but you want me. What a fucked up world that is" I lied to get him to turn around and leave.

Jisung shakes his head "Liar, your pants would be on fire. Do you think I want what is best for me? Do you think a diabetic eats no sugar? No they don't, they still eat it because guess what, no matter how hard they try and they know they shouldn't, they still love it. Like I love you." Those words make my heart happy when it shouldn't.

I feel us both sink down to the floor before I said "No,don't love me. I can't take this pain Jisung. I can't lose you, how do you think I will feel when I have to kill you when the time comes? I can't bear that pain like I thought I could." I admit coming clean to him.

"Then I will take that pain on with a smile and say 'I love you' one last time so those are my last words to you so that you never forget it." Jisung says through his sobs as he holds me tight.

"Let go of me, you don't love me." I look him in the eyes before he slaps me.

"Use hypnosis on me again like that and see where it gets you. I would say the grave but you're already there."

I feel him hold me tighter before kissing my shoulder. "Just because I said that or did that, doesn't mean anything. It just means I'm here for now and I'm not going anywhere for a while." 22 years, 21 in September.

"I can't, I can't. I can't bear to see you get older,to see you die while I stay the same. You are loving a killer." I said to him weakly before he put his hand on my head as I lay my head on his shoulder.

"A killer,a police officer,a doctor, no matter what you pretend to be, I still love you. I am loyal to you. I want you."

"This isn't the way it is supposed to go, I am supposed to kill and be done, not love and be done. I'm not supposed to kiss you or make you cum or watch your precious.."

"It's okay, I'm prepared for that day to happen. But I am rest assured because I see a familiar face when I die." Those words that Jisung said only made me sob harder. "Be mine Minho. Be mine until you kill me. Then guide me."

"Then so be it, your fate is sealed" If only I truly knew, that Happiness can happen. But if only I knew that that year is going to tick by within a blink of a eye