Jaskier The Bard's Foolproof Guide To Seducing Your Witcher

The Outfit

Was planning to post this within a week of the last chapter, but words just came to me for this one. I had a lot of fun using old timey insults for the bard on bard violence.

CHAPTER WARNING: This chapter contains a brief scene of attempted sexual assault. It's nothing too intense, but you have been warned.

"What," Geralt says, eyes widening, "is that? "

Jaskier catches Geralt's gaze through the mirror and fights the urge to smirk. Instead he smiles brightly as if nothing is amiss. "Why, it's my new outfit," he declares, straightening the ribbon under his chin. "I just had it tailored. Do you like it?"

He turns to face the witcher who is red in the face, then poses, showing off the newly made garment in all its glory. To Jaskier's delight, Geralt looks like he's struggling to comprehend the sight before him.

"It's...certainly something."

"It's the latest fashion," Jaskier replies proudly, except that's not entirely true. The doublet is technically the latest fashion, but not in court. In brothels. But Geralt doesn't need to know that.

"I have no need for fashion," the witcher grumbles, but his eyes still cautiously glance over Jaskier's form.

He's looking, Jaskier realizes with immense satisfaction, but he's trying not to be noticed. Well that's a relief then. If the witcher had no reaction at all Jaskier would have assumed him impossible to seduce. This however, is a positively delicious turn of events.

Jaskier turns his attention back to the mirror and resumes his task of straightening the many ribbons along his collar and sleeves.

The outfit he's commissioned is more corset than doublet. A delicate thing, pale blue and white, that laces along the waist and sleeves with tiny embroidered ribbons. The sleeves are cuffed and ruffled, hemmed with layer upon layer of white lace trim. The back is tailed with more lace and ruffles, barely held together by dozens of tiny loops and beads. And the front rises all the way up Jaskier's neck, tied like a miniature corset and centered nicely with a neat bow and opal brooch.

Is it a practical choice for Jaskier's performance tonight? Most definitely not. Will it cause a court scandal? Absolutely. But Jaskier looks fantastic, and what better time is there to seduce your witcher companion than when you are looking your best?

"Maybe you have no need for fashion, my dear," Jaskier lilts, slinking away from the mirror and past Geralt as slowly as he dares. "A bard, on the other hand, must take things like this into consideration."

The witcher just responds with one of his signature grunts and leaves it at that.

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Jaskier always likes to make a bit of a scene at court.

Part of it is because he enjoys being the center of attention, and good or bad, attention builds fame. He likes to captivate his audience in every aspect of his presence, not just his singing, likes to feel their gaze on him, hear the laughs and whistles that tell him people are having a good time. The other part of it is because Jaskier has a history in which he's loathed court. Growing up as a Viscount under the stifling thumb of his parents forced him to be on his best behaviour, and court is so very dreary when you have to behave.

And so, Jaskier now uses court as a chance to enjoy all the merriment he missed out on as a youth, and better yet, scandalize the more conservative noblemen while he does. Besides, bards are nothing if not dramatic, and Jaskier is a top notch bard.