lonely together~~~ intrulogical

shit

Remus's pov~~~

I feel like I don't live during the day anymore. Not like thats a bad thing, I dont mind at all. However, I do think that I wish it was always night. That's when I truly think I come alive. He makes me feel alive. He doesn't make me feel like some loose screw. He makes me feel human.

These past few nights have really made a difference in the way I am, I've noticed. I think I've become a little calmer during the day, but that might just be because I'm tired. And I've even sleeping easier too, probably for the same reason. This might sound like I'm complaining, but it's actually the opposite. I love this. I've never felt this kind of peace or love or excitement In my life. This is it, this is where I'm supposed to be.

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The evening sprung around faster than I thought, wich was thrilling. I was practically bouncing. I got to see my nerdy wolvereen! Washing dishes has never been so fun, it was a shame forgetting about your emotionally unstable best friend wasn't.

"What are you smiling for?" Decite asked, clearly drunk. Another fault of mine.
"No reason." I purred happily, still cleaning dishes, unaware of his tone of voice.
"You've been going out alot lately. Why?" He asked me again.
"Just going out to see a friend." I hummed. I regret those words.
"Friend? What friend?" He advanced towards me, grabbing me and pulling me to face him. "You don't have any friends! I'm the only one you've got!"
"Well maybe I met someone."
"Who the fuck could you have met wich you possibly didn't know before?"
"And why do you care so much?"
"Cus I don't believe you! You Dont have friends, nobody could ever like you!"
"Yeah? Well he does! He loves me!"
"Does he, now? Has he told you that? Or have you made that up to make you feel better?"

I feel silent. I had been caught out.
"Exactly." He continued. "Nobody could ever love you. You are disgusting! You are truly hideous and unsightly! You are nothing!" He spat at me. Tears formed in my eyes as he looked down on me. "Look at you. Crying cus you know it's true." He leant down and kissed my forehead. "I'm sorry, I just don't want you to get hurt. You have an overactive imagination, there's no way in hell anyone but me could love you. You needed a reality check." He looked at me with soft, blank eyes and gently kissed me. I know better than to stop him or retaliate. I reluctantly kissed him back. We stayed like that for a short while before he pulled back. "Have fun with your little boyfriend tonight. But Mark my words, he could never love a creature like you." He then kissed my forehead then slunk out of the room.

Why did I even say anything?

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I attempted to shake what happened off as I walked over to our usual spot. I think I waited there for a few minutes before I had a feeling of dread pour over me. I decided I would walk to the light side of the mind Palace just incase he was waiting for me there. To my relief, the porch light was on. He was there! I ran over to see him but suddenly stopped. There, on the porch wasn't the man i loved. It was patton.

"Hello, remus." Patton said bluntly, taking a sip of tea.
"Patton. Fancy seeing you here. Lovely night we are having." I forced a friendly demeanour.
"Logan's not coming out tonight. So beat it."
"Wait-what?"
Patton smiled menacingly at me. "He doesn't want to see you. Ever. So politely, piss off before I get roman to sort you out, understand?"
I was at a total loss for words. I just gave him a glance and walked off.

My heart shattered into a million pieces. I thought we had something, I guess not. I'm so dumb for thinking anyone like him could love someone like me. I cant express what Im feeling. It's a definite mix of sadness and disappointment, but stronger than that. I cried the whole way home, and more when I got home. There was clearly signs that he secretly hated me. I dont know what, but there must have been. People don't just hate you for nothing, right? Maybe I made him uncomfortable? Maybe he thinks I'm hideous. Maybe he wants me to disappear. Maybe I should.

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Ayyyyy it's ya boi finally updating this book! Honestly, this is one of my most popular books and I just want to say thanks for everyone who likes like crap.