Bones

"I Got This Feeling, Yeah, You Know Where I'm Losing All Control...~"

Someone requested a Mikey angst oneshot based on the song 'Bones' from Imagine Dragons! I can't remember who and I forgot to screenshot it- If you requested this, enjoy!

TW!!! This mentions depression and suicidal idealation/a suicide attempt. If this triggers you in any way, please do not read.

*gives tissues*

Enjoy the good old Mikey angst :)

Also, the lyrics to 'Bones' will be randomly incorporated into this and will be in italics. Pretend that it's playing in the background. 

And, this takes place after the series. It's also an au where Mikey's family always treated him well and were amazing and to him always-

And Splinter didn't die-

This is my first Songfic!!

~*~

Mikey sighed to himself, laying in bed. It was the middle of the night and here he was, staring into the dark. He couldn't remember the last time he'd slept. His eyes were red-rimmed and puffy. Mikey stared at the ceiling with no emotion.

This was how most of his nights went. Mikey would just lie in bed in the darkness and think about things. Things like all the stuff he and his family had been through in the last few years. Things that confused him.

Everything was fine. Why wasn't he?

Mikey sighed softly, closing his eyes. He didn't know what was wrong with him. Mikey wasn't really sad. In fact, he didn't feel anything. He was numb. He couldn't even seem to feel physical things right now. Like pain or hunger.

Mikey had a feeling he was depressed. He had several symptoms. Loss of interest in hobbies and activities. Insomnia. Loss of appetite. Rumination of thoughts. social isolation. Crying without knowing why.

But, Mikey didn't know why he was depressed. Everything was fine. His bros were good, Splinter was good, April, Karai, Casey, and their other allies were good. Nothing was wrong. The city was at peace. And yet, Mikey felt dissatisfied with life.

He wasn't really sure why. His family and friends treated him very well, even showing him a lot of affection and praise. But, despite the positive love from his family, Mikey felt empty. He didn't want to hurt himself or anything. But...his mood was lower than ever.

"What's wrong with me...? I should be happy...everything is fine. I should be fine." Mikey sat up in bed, sighing as he wiped the tear tracks from his thinning cheeks. "Why do I feel so...numb? Why can't I feel anything...?" He whispered, rubbing his red eyes.

The orange-clad brother sighed once more. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and forced himself up. He hadn't been out of his room very much in the last few weeks. He barely ate and only drank water. His family was growing increasingly worried.

Mikey walked to the bathroom. He closed the door and flicked on the light, wincing at the sudden brightness. It wasn't something he was used to anymore. All he did was sit in the dark and keep to himself.

Gimme, gimme, gimme some time to think

Mikey looked in the mirror. He winced at how he looked. He hadn't looked into a mirror in days. He didn't realize  how bad he looked. 

I'm in the bathroom, looking at me

His eyes were red-rimmed, puffy, and had bags under them. His eyes looked more dull. His skin seemed paler. And he wasn't as slightly chubby as before. His chubby cheeks had thinned out. He couldn't remember the last time he ate a full meal.