Eavesdropping is not a good idea

BRUH

"Hey Armin,I need to tell mikasa something important,where is she?" Eren asked as he entered Armin's room like a boss

"Jesus christ Eren knock first before you enter.. " Armin gently shouted,slamming his book down on the table.

"Forget about that goddamn knocking shit and tell me where is Mikasa!"

"Calm thy dickies Eren, I saw her with *cough*yourboyfriend*cough* levi heichou so maybe she's in his office or something.."

"Okay thanks! See ya later!" He shouted, leaving Armin's room.

He was walking down the hallway,heading to Levi's office when he suddenly heard some strange noises coming out from Commander Erwin's office. He also noticed that his office door was cracked open. He hesitated at first,scared of what he might see. But he couldnt help his curiosity so he needed to walk closer. He trudged along the hallway.

"What the fuck are you doing Eren.." he said to himself.

Then the angry teen heard a stressed and loud "so close.."

He then heard Levi's voice as he said "it won't fucking fit,it's too huge!" His voice whined,irritated as usual.

Eren just stood there awkwardly,just what the heck is going on? He wanted to open the door but he hesitated,what if something he didnt like was going on?

"Hey Mikasa come here and try it"

'What the fuck?! Why is Mikasa- oh god..' Eren thought,wanting to freaking runaway but he can't.

"*groans* fuck, How can you even- midget it's too big!"

"Oi have some respect you brat,you dont want a punishment do you?.."

"Im trying to help here you dick munch. Oh no it's starting to leak.."

"Argh Erwin,this fucking shit is too big *grunts*"

"Well it's the only one I have..."

"Why dont we try to use yours shorty?"

"What? No i dont want mine to get filty!!"

"Why do you even have one if you're not gonna use it!!"

"Shut up it's none of your buisness you brat!- "

"You guys needs to stop this fight and fix my thing. Mikasa hurry up and get Levi's shit"

"Hai Commander Erwin!"

"Oi you- Erwin let go of me!"

Now Eren had a somewhat disturbed look on his face. Was levi heichou and Mikasa reffering to Erwin's...Are they talking about...they had to hurry because...Eren should've walked away. But he couldn't. He just couldn't. Were they doing what he thought they're doing?

"*groaning intensifies* C-commander! It's huge too!!"

"*grunting and stuff* fucking hell! Erwin let go of me im going to fix this shit"

"Mikasa go get a towel and wipe that thing off!" Levi added

"Alright,alright stop shouting!"

"You two,if the two of you would not stop shouting,im going to get a duct tape and tape both of your mouths" Erwin warned

"G-gomen.."

"Tch"

"Oi Mikasa are you done wiping that wet shit"

"Mmhmm"

"Oi human eyebrow,give me that long,thick and hard thing..."

Eren is trying to control his self. He's really trying not to peek,but his patience is wearing thin.

"Okay Mikasa come here"

"What?! Me agai-"

"Sshhh,come here and slip it in,i dont want to get filty"

"Becareful Mikasa..."

"Hai commander!!" Mikasa replied back

"I've been waiting for this since yesterday,thank god i found the two of you.."

Eren's jaw dropped in horror. He never thought that his beloved captain,sister,and commander are having an affair.

Mikasa made a grunt sound "I-i think i got it.."
"Wait brat," Levi objected " push it deeper.."

There was a moment of silence then the three of them cheered. "Finally!!"

That was it,Eren barged through the door
"EXCUSE ME SIR BUT I THINK THIS KIND OF THING IS FORBIDDE-"

The three of them turned their heads in surprise.

"Oh hey eren what are you doing here?" Mikasa asked innocently. Eren saw the three of them in the bathroom,Mikasa was kneeling beside the sink,holding a screw driver while Levi is standing beside Mikasa,holdig a bucket of whatever. Well Erwin was just standing behind them holding some screws with too.

"Y-you,what are you doing here Mikasa?"

"Uumm,helping heichou fix Commander Erwin's bathroom sink.."

Eren's expression dropped. "B-but what was all the groaning and- ah fuck nevermind. Sorry for the intrusion,y-yeah i-imma go now-"

"Oi green eyed brat," levi said,giving him a teasing grin "fixing a sink is not forbidden....unless you're thinking of something inappropriate"

"N-no sir,please forget bout what I said earlier i was just-"

"Oh my,I thought you were an innocent kid Eren.." Erwin teased

Eren is blushing like a mudatrucker right now "But sir im not-"

Seing Mikasa's confused face,Levi nudges her and asked "hey Mikasa, your brother juat thou-"

"IM SORRY SIR BUT I NEED TO BORROW MIKASA NOW THANK YOU" Eren shouted. Grabbing Mikasa's wrist,dragging her out of the room.

"Oi you dickless brat,wait"

Eren stopped walking,turning around to face his captain.

"H-hai??"

Levi gave him a scary smirk.

"It's not nice to eavesdrop Jaegar.."

ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE SOOOOOO ╮(╯3╰)╭