My Ship with Gerard Way (...the story continues.)

Chapter One: Forgiveness

When i start writing i want to express my feelings and opinions soulfully and expressionatively. I am wondered about my fatalities and book lorn. Whether i am sane or being curious opposed to desiring a friendship locked and tightened every hour of the time. I wonder mostly of how i am to bond a new friendship into reality sense. As in theyre there for me in the real world not just the mindful dream world. How am i going to find this person that i have spent a chunk of time on throughout my living and dying ages. Where and how far will you go to believeing in everything that comes to mind. How do you spend your worth while with someone versus being happy alone. What more can i ask of myself.

So when i meet a new person i wonder where in my mind whether its inner or outer expression do i know this person soulfully.
Its a matter of time and how clues mend together to progress your righteous mind and thoughts to create an answer on repetition and accuracy.
Do you not remember everything yet?
I wonder if everyone thinks the same way i do yet wonder how different i must stay to be set as the center of attention around my own inclusive body and mind. What entitles you to see me everyday?
Its everyday i think of the best and the worst. The greatest achievement versus the best you can do.

When i think of Gerard Way...
I believe in the abstractness of stretching myself around a corner wedge of cake made to future and respect my mind so much that my book entitles my next line of life.
So what entitles me to Gerard Way? Hes like the biggest role model in my eyes. Hes been so successful in getting enough followers and patrons to do his biddings with him.
Fans in bands man.
Anyways.
When i think of Gerard Way...
I think of all the great times that have been created with him and myself. And furthermore of the times he has shared with me about his life. I wonder if he really cares about me sometimes and i find myself nearly wrecking everything and become scared if Gerard was to really leave me inside. I wouldnt be the same. And i have tasted that kind of lifestyle. It sucked.
Everyone became ugly at sum point and refuses to come back out for it. Not us but the system we live around. Todays societal gain from psyche centers is illegally pried at. And i believe that we should shut down some psyche centers because they dont treat and care for people the way the people want them to be.
I hope that the next time i become incarcerated or hospitalized that its easier and without faulty lines. No body rushing to keep me in there longer. No harassment at the med line.

Gerard Way is an amazing person and i want to express and stretch a few reality points of value with my audience. The audience i have been growing since i was a child. The one about my inspiring career goals of becoming a singer and an artist. For anyone wondering what im doing with + amount of people following me around. We are just old together. I repeatedly admired Gerard throughout the years and wouldnt be surprised if they turn around one day and find me waiting for them online behind my texts on the screen. Begging out for dear mercy to be my friend.

I often remember when i was younger that i would choose to listen to the My Chemical Romance May Death Never Stop You (The Greatest Hits) album and honestly ive heard some of those songs almost a hundred times somehow. I was young when i first realized i could listen to my dream spheres or star formations in my head. As they were songs or repeated language in my head and on my body. Or as i got older i started writing my own songs. Songs in my head on my sleeve. I have had many stereos amd sound system hook ups to my head and such its unbeleiveable. No body i know seriously does any of that at my younger ages. Im like the first of my kind.
When i became friends with Gerard i shared alot of the music and lyrics with him as i was socially in love with writing and making things with my friends and other musicians.

Earth beings wear bikinis.

I am just strapped and wrapped up against the worldly involvement here on earth. I am so star shocked though. Wasteing my time and eyes with people i have never met before in the real act of beyond my eyes. Gerard is simply one of my favorite peoples. And its an earth born right to wear bikinis for fun not to pervert and ask questions that arent socially allowing.
Its every day i wonder to myself and turn to my friends for answers i am struggling to find an answer to everything in a matter of time.
Why cant i be more like Gerard freaking Way. Hes so lucky to have the type of attention he gets. I want to do the things he does but i dont want to be shut down for it. I want to be a happy successful person.
I have been curving away from poetic cigarettes and after burns of weeds and buds. I vape now thoufh and thrashingly enjoy the nicotine highs. They keep me wired like coffee does.
Grape Honeydew and Watermelon Bubble Gum flavors do the trick to my aspiring eyes. What more can a person ask for when theyre fully making enough money to live off of for a long time. I wish my stuff sold more. Like sold enough where i could live off of.

I want to express this heavily and honestly. My first impression of finding a message on my phone from "Gerard way private".
I was so excited and happily entrances by the thought of talking to him in real life and not just in our heads or on a imaginative platform. He was strongly incapable of being honest to me about himself and wanted to keep the conversation a secret. It was all lies but a person poseing as Gerard Way. I hate people some days. And thats natural and surprisingly strange to me. I was entirely happy to be talking to gerard it took me a week to realize and stay forward that it wasnt really him and not necessarily a friend of him or mine also.
Something about irish english boys with dark hair and bright eyes really triggers my inabilities to live strong and nod on. Hes so beautiful.
I long to have the career goals of mine met. And this conversation with this poser was why i couldnt put the phone down. I just casually kept asking him questions. Maybe he lied. Theres definately a liar in here somewhere. And a scam.

When i first wanted to get into social media Gerard wasnt social media famous. He was still young and i urged peer pressuringly at everyone. I wanted to be his best friend. And here i am to this day best friends but in a darker place. We just soulfully bond and relent phrases together. Hes a cross on my wrists.

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