This is my fucking life

its time.

•Y/N•
I don't understand the point of trying for him anymore. so I decided I wasn't going to, I started going to parties all the time hooking up with random guys who's names I don't remember. I changed up my style, I gained confidence. Losing ashtray was the best thing that ever happened to me or so I thought. this one party I went to during the summer, i saw ash he wasn't with gia this time but with one of the girls I used to call my friend. I could feel ashtrays eyes look me up and down as I walked over to fez and handed him money, he slipped me a little something..when I was with ash I never did drugs or even wanted too but as things started changing I started to get addicted and you know. I maybes overdosed once this year, only once. my parents found me and my sister tried to make sure nobody knew about it but ALOT of people found out and asked about it. All I know is I was upset and it's just kinda happened. anyway, that was my year it's been a hell of one and I'm finally 15.

•AshTray•
She stopped talking to me, she stopped paying attention to me. it's like I was fucking invisible to her, it was like that the whole rest of the year but if I'm being honest losing her was amazing. I stopped stressing out all the time I didn't have to worry about what she needed or where she was. I stopped worrying. I got with a new girl..I didn't know she was one of
Y/N'S friends, I had never seen Tiffany ever in my life till she walked Into one of my classes and sat right beside me. She was gorgeous. Her dark brown eyes, her long black hair and her style. I knew tiff would end up being mine before the end of the year, guess what? I was correct I always am. It was summertime it was close to 'her' birthday, but this time I couldn't get her anything. moving on, I went to this party with fez and ended up seeing tiff, we all sat outside talking till Y/N walked over to fez. I looked up her and down she looked hot in that dress of hers but tiff looked hot in her dress too, so watching Y/N hand money to fez and hand her drugs was shocking. I never thought Y/N would do drugs but apparently she does..God. I miss her so much but it's better for us both to not talk or be together. We hadn't talked in a while and I don't think we ever will ever again.

(IM BACKKKKKK BUT THIS IS A SHORT LITTLE PART AND IM LEARING HOW IM GONNA MAKE THEM TALK SO I THINK IM GONNA WRITE PARAGRAPHS ABT LIKE THE DETAILS AND MAKE THE DIALOGUE BE LIKE MY OTHER PARTS MAYBE...IDK I NEED HELP OR MAYBE I SHOULD START WRITING DIFFERENTLY? LMK)