SOG (English)

#24

He gasped wildly as if he had just been pulled out from being trapped underwater. Sun Jae-Chan put his mind back on track. While shaking from excessive tension, burden, and suffocation, he hurled a storm of curses at his past self.

<<You dumb bastard.

This fool!

You seriously, seriously should have done a field guidance way earlier…!

It was really…

Wah.

It was really nice.>>

<<Crazy. It's not like you're a pervert…>>

It was maddening. Everything he hoped to have in the past, was right here in this place.

Even though he couldn't breathe and black docks flickered in his vision because of suffocation, even though he felt as if he were facing the universe at the edge of an unending cliff... It was good. His heart throbbed painfully because of Go Woo-Jin, who had barged hotly against him. While hugging his rock-like body heated like lava, his heart felt sore because of his greed to hold him more and touch him more closely. He inhaled deeply the familiar body scent that filled his lungs, and closed only his eyelids tightly, relishing in it.

Even if he didn't think he would die of a lack of breath eventually, he would never have been able to push Woo-Jin away. It was just that good. It was a realization so bitter that made him cry.

<<Humans really don't change. To even think of this situation as enjoyable.>>

He resigned himself, catching his breath. No matter how much he regressed, his true nature didn't seem to change.

He didn't know if human nature was inherently evil, as some scholars claimed. It was clear that his own nature was evil. In the past, it was so nice when his friend* (GWJ), who he had always wanted to lean on, was forced to leave everything in his hands, but when he voluntarily hugged him warmly, he felt like he was going to go crazy. Even though he must have been in pain long enough to lose his sense of reason.

<<It's driving me crazy.>>

With a flushed face, Jae-Chan criticized himself for being mean. At least, it became a relief finding luck in the misfortune of being freaked out by his inferior self, which in turn made him do his best in guiding more than ever.

— …….

Meanwhile, Go Woo-Jin was distorting his eyes as he watched Sun Jae-Chan struggling to breathe, without knowing that he was thinking that way.

His wide open lips, the rising heat, and his burning eyes looked painful, but... Perhaps because of their last contact, it was perceived as a strangely arousing scene.

He was stunned by his sudden excitement. Was his sense of reason now paralyzed by his instinct as an Esper and messed up?

His breathing became rough again. At that moment, when irrational impulses started kicking in, he was about to hit himself on the head.

— I'm fine.

Sun Jae-Chan reached out urgently. Swallowing his breath, still unable to amend his messy top.

Nevertheless, the absurd thought came to him* (GWJ), he wanted to push his hand further under that disheveled shirt. He wanted to feel the touch of the thin skin that seemed to cling to his palm again. <<Was I this kind of person?>> Go Woo-Jin became stunned again and squeezed his flinching fingertips tightly.

He had never done this before. It was also the first time he had physical contact with the guide while being guided.

— …….