its okay to not be okay // tmf

I Don't Want Your Pity, I Want Your Love.

Jake wiped his eyes and hid his face in his hands, trying to turn his face away from the boy in front of him.

"Jake?" Sean mumbled. Jake continued to cry, shoving his hands as far as he could into his face.

"Go away," Jake managed to yelp.

"I.. don't want to leave you like this?" Sean admitted, taking a step closer hesitantly.

"I'm sorry, Sean. I'm trying," Jake said, his voice cracking as tears ran down his face.

"Trying?" Sean questioned.

"I'm trying to be happy for you, you shouldn't to have to put up with me like this. I don't deserve to be upset, more importantly, you don't deserve to put up with me being upset!" Jake ranted, his voice scratchy and tired and muffled due to his hands cupping over his mouth. His hands were wet with tears and slobber and he uncovered his face with one hand to help himself to his feet.

Sean stood in awe, watching Jake with an upset expression. He stared genially until Jake was walking past him quickly, his face covered by his hands.

"I- Jake. Wait," Sean called, trying to grab at Jake, who just stormed off and out of the bathroom. Sean thought about Jake's words, standing there for a moment. "How did we not notice.."

Sean walked out, looking left and right in hope he'd spot Jake. He didn't. He sighed and frowned deeply, walking to the music room. Sean opened the door and the room went dead silent when they saw Sean's head down.

"Sean? What happened?" Hailey asked, everyone else curious.

"We gotta find Jake," Sean mumbled, and everyone exchanged looks.

"Was he not in the bathroom?" Milly asked, setting the guitar she held down.

"No he was," Sean said, rubbing the back of his neck. He looked up at the group.

"What happened then?" Luke asked.

"Well.." Sean sighed. "So he wasn't crying."

"Why would he be?" Hailey asked.

Sean shrugged. "He wasn't crying. He was sobbing."

"What?" Zander accidentally let slip, but ignored it.

"Is he alright?! What happened?" Milly asked eagerly, walking over to the door.

"Of course he's not alright! He said things that made me realize how badly we need to be checking up on him daily. So, come on. Even you, Zander," Sean spoke to everyone, opening the door for everyone as they walked out.

Jake stormed down the hall quickly, wiping at the tears in his eyes and on his cheeks. He slammed open the door to the cafeteria, a few people staring but not enough to stop a conversation.

He quickly made his way over to his lunch table, grabbed Drew's wrist and dragged him up from the table without making eye contact once.

"Jake? Wha- hey. Stop," Drew yelped as his knee slammed against the table.

"Woah, Jake, dude, are you okay? Why are you crying?" Henry asked, leaning backwards to see the boy's face.

"I'm not, just fucking come on, Drew," Jake mumbled under his breath, tightly tugging on Drew. Henry and Liam both stood once Drew had been dragged along with Jake, following the two as well.

"Jake, calm down. What's going on?" Drew said, tugging back against Jake. Jake sniffed sharply and let a sob escape his lips, wiping at tears on his face. "Jake?!"

"What the hell is going on with them?" Liam asked Henry, the two of them both far behind Jake and Drew.

"I don't knoooow!" Henry admitted.