Anyone Else

Josh and I have been friends for years. He's rarely posted photos with me though because he knows how people will react. He doesn't want anyone freaking out and DMing me awful things.

We've been roommates for a few years now and there's these strange mutual feelings between us that we never talk about.

It popped up a couple years ago. We were throwing a house party and afterwards, we were both a little drunk and we both get flirty when we're drunk. So one thing led to another and then we woke up in the same bed!

Nothing happened though. We just snuggled up together for the night because, apparently, two other friends of ours took Josh's room and he said he was too tired to move them. So I let him sleep with me.

Anyways, enough backstory.

Sofia and Saylor are over today.

They've been hanging out with Josh a lot and in turn, me.

And I absolutely love them, I do. Especially Sofia. I've known her longer than I've known Saylor though she is also heaven sent.

But ever since the premiere, I haven't been able to shake this constant irk I feel when she's around.

I know, I know. They're actors. It's a show. The kiss was fake.

But it looked so real! The chemistry, the love...

And it hurt to watch. I won't lie and say I didn't walk away from watching that, having an epiphany.

Like every moment of banter or anytime I've seen them touch, was more than what it seemed.

And, I'm jealous. Obviously.

So as much as I love her, I feel this odd tug at my heart. The irk. Or ick, I suppose, whenever she's around. Especially around him.

But I can't say anything. I won't do that. It'd open a can of worms for all parties involved so it's better to stay quiet.

Saylor and I are sitting on the couch. The other two are in the kitchen.

Saylor can tell there's something going on inside my mind but she hasn't pried for info at all. I'm grateful for that.

Sofia hasn't seemed to notice. But then again she's been with Josh all night.

And he's been so captivated by her.
It's like as soon as she walked in, he hasn't left her side. And she hasn't left his.

We've just been chilling inside all day. We played some games earlier but we got bored of it quickly since there's only 4 of us. Then we sang karaoke and made a few tik toks which held our attention for a while. Then we ordered pizza  from my favorite restaurant and we've been sitting on the couch watching movies since.

But the night is winding down so Saylor is getting her stuff ready to go and Josh is just throwing some leftovers for them into a container. Sofia's there just to help.

I'm not even really watching whatever this movie was anymore. It never really held my interest. Or any of us I suppose.

I glance over to the kitchen and there they are. Sofia is just standing there, telling him a story. And he's stopped whatever it was he was doing and is just looking at her.

But it's not just any look.

It's one that I know well.

It's the kind of look that makes your heart stop. The kind of look that makes your lungs feel like they've been chained together.

The softness in his eyes and the way the light hits them...

It makes you feel like you're the most beautiful thing he's ever seen.