If it takes all night, or a hundred years | COD Alex/Farah

Chapter 1

In front of her small group of soldiers, Farah appeared as strong as ever. She had a stern voice, full of strength, and a commanding presence despite her small stature. She was a born leader. But she left them each time with a weight on her shoulders that she thought she'd outrun. Focus was getting harder, they weren't making any headway. After the destruction of the chlorine gas, things slowed down a bit, and they'd been biding their time looking for the rest of the Russian leaders and taking them out. And now they'd found that missile in the bunker. Their mission would change then, and expanded, but it was still a lot of waiting. And they still had to worry about the enemy soldiers pillaging the nearby villages.

She entered the room to speak to Price with her shoulders back, forgetting the weight. But he was smart. He saw it.

"Holding up alright?" He asked, looking up at her from where he sat.

"I don't know what you mean." She mumbled the lie, running her fingers across the map on the table before her, her eyes following.

Price stood. "No body, Farah."

She met his eyes, wary. She didn't want to talk about things like that, and certainly not with a man like him. Because he saw her, more than most.

"Alex Keller is a miracle in himself, but coming back a second time?" She smiled sadly, shaking her head. "He deserved a burial, at least. To finally find some peace."

"We should look for him. Give him that."

Farah didn't look at him. She knew it wouldn't give either of them any peace. And she had an aversion to the hope they would find him in one piece, let alone alive. She'd handled a lot, she saw carnage every day, but she wasn't sure she could handle laying her eyes on pieces of him.

"At what cost?" She spoke so softly. Price watched her as she continued to pace.

They'd returned two days prior with her three men and buried them. They'd both prayed, in their own way, the least they could do to ease their own guilt. And then they hadn't spoken of it. They'd both been hoping that word of him, sight of him, would turn up quickly. It hadn't. Alex was MIA for all intents and purposes, although his action wasn't sanctioned. He was there for Price and Farah, and Price and Farah alone. But without knowing where to look, they had to accept the pain of assessing the resources they had. They had to assess the cost.

"We're in a lull." He shrugged.

He sat back down and she stopped pacing. "You're not under my command, Captain. I wouldn't tell you not to send someone out."

Price was there alongside her, but he'd come in with just his task force. She was the one with the army. He had no one to send but himself or Kyle and the loss of either of them might put a halt on everything.

"You don't think it's worth it." He stated. He wasn't put off by it. He wanted her to talk.

"I'm not like you and your men. 'No man left behind' would have wiped us out a long time ago." She couldn't make eye contact but she couldn't bring herself to walk out. It was not just another man they were speaking of. He was worth the conversation, at least.

"That's not what I asked."

"Of course, I—" She hesitated. Admitting to even a single feeling felt like overexertion. Like she couldn't afford to expend the energy. "He's worth it. He's worth that and much more. But I, unfortunately, have to choose. There's no way around that."

Price nodded. "I know."

--

Often, when Alex woke, it took him some time to realize it. It was so dark where they held him that he struggled to tell whether his eyes were truly open or not. He blinked a few times and let them stay closed. It had been thirteen days, and they'd started feeding him again. They must have begun to realize he'd die without it.