Pain Only Makes Us Stronger

Back In Hell

"Just my fucking luck," she thought tiredly.

"Get up Natalia," Madame B said.

Natasha struggled to inhale air through her lungs as they constricted and expanded trying to bring oxygen into her body. Her back ached from the impact on the hard floor.

She almost released a grunt but realized who she was with. Her main tormentor. As she looked at her former Madame her body went into fight or flight mode. She physically fought her body's instincts to stay still. No one should see her vulnerable and weak like this especially not her Madame.

Madame B would never allow so much as a peep to come from her widows no matter the injury. Oh, she has a broken arm to bad kill her she is disposable there are always more. Oh, she dislocated her shoulder well just pop it into place and send her off on her next mission. Widows are made of strong, unbreakable material from Mother Russia.

Widows are made of Marble

Weakness will only get you killed. The only person you can trust is yourself. The second most important mantra is Love is for Children.

The one that took her the longest to unlearn. To realize that love is not for children but for everyone including someone like her who has killed men, women, and children alike. She can still love and be loved in return.

She found her family in the Avengers. Her loving dysfunctional family that she could call her own. Then her first family was Alexi, Melina, and Yelena. She found people who she could call her family and gained some that she thought weren't. Only to be brought back in time to have old wounds opened and have salt poured on them.

  She should be over the pain she caused. She thought this part of her life was long over. That she healed with time and lots of vodka, but some things were forever she guessed. She never thought she would ever see Madame B again after she defected to SHIELD and especially after she finally took them down for good with her family. To never see the woman again who tormented her for as long as she could remember. That she would no longer have to relive the trauma hell that is the Red Room.

The KGB was the Red Rooms' main partner in crime for years. They would pay Dreykov millions over the years to use his widows for espionage and intel gathering. The widows made the KGB one of the most feared security agencies so much so that even nations became terrified of potentially having one of their sleeper agents within their borders. The Soviet Union had fallen and birthed Russia from its ashes, but the Red Room was forever.

They always instilled in them that the Red Room would stand the test of time and they could never escape.

Her other thoughts on how she got there, and Thanos would have to be put on the back burner for now as her main focus was to survive.

Natasha ended her inner monologue as she quickly scrambled off the floor standing up at attention with her hands clasped behind her back to show her Madame's authority over her. Even though it's been years her muscle memory kicked in making her look as if nothing had changed. As if she had never been deprogrammed from her teachings.

She finally took the time to take in her surroundings. Madame B was a few feet in front of her while nine widows stood off to the left side lined up with their backs to the wall as they observed them. And one widow to her right stood in a fighting stance.

"Natalia stop fooling around and end this before I kill her and then you," Madame B said firmly with a stoic expression that if you looked in the right places could tell she was infuriated as she backed away signaling for them to be back into their stances.

"You want to start fights, Natalia? Then you must end them"

Natasha dropped into her low crotch without a second thought as she faced the other widow. Anastasia, she realized as she took a good look at her. They were rivals since they were twelve, she never knew what grudge the girl had against her, but she remembers snapping one day after Anastasia had crossed the line bringing up Yelena's name. Out of all days she just had to be brought back. Why this one?