Clexa#what happened in the 3.season

Chapter 1

Clark's POV
I smell the forest around me. I'm tired, so so tired but I have to keep walking. I left camp Jaha maybe 3 hours ago. I couldn't stay, I couldn't watch those kids, I still see the Jasper's face with tears, holding Maya's stiff body covered in blood. It's all my fault! I killed them all. Kids, families, our allies. By one move of the lever I ended life of hundreds of innocent people. Am I a human? Who am I?
Maybe Lexa was right, we are the same. Cruel,cold and heartless. Lexa! It's all her fault because she left us, she ran away like a coward. She didn't even look back, just walked away with HER people.
I am walking trought the forest but I don't know where. It's getting darker and I need to rest. Few minutes ago I passed near the river so I know that I'm very close to Drop-ship but that is the last place where I should go. I don't believe that Bellami listened to me and no one is going after me. So after 5 minutes of thinking where to go I finally finded a place for sleep. It's a car where I was trapped by a poisonous fog with Wells and Finn and where we got drunk. Oh, Wells, my friend. Until today I never realised how much I miss him. I was so busy all the time but now I have time just for myself and I let my thoughts spread "all over my head." I'm thinking about our nights at the Ark, about our childhood, how he protected me when he lied to me about my fathers death. He must have loved me a lot, I thought. But when I finally heared the truth and I stopped hating him he was killed. And so was Finn. Finn, the next persone who's blood is on my hands.
Finally I feel tears in my eyes. I didn't cry yet but now I let my emotions come out.
I want to cry for the people I killed or the others who were killed but just before I fall asleep I figure out that I'm crying about myself. I feel pain in my chest and looking out of the car's window at the sky I'm thinking about the Ark and how would my life look if I was not send to the Ground or if there wasn't any lack of oxygen.
I'm thinking about Lexa and her's betray. It's impossible for me that the girl who kissed me and invited me to go with her to Polis could do this kind of monstrous thing. My heart hurts in just a simple memory of her. I feel anger, hate, sadness but I feel some kind of warm feelings too. And they are telling me to forgive.
At the Mount Weather I made decision by my head not thinking what are the consequences be. I just wanted to save my loved ones. Decision to left camp Jaha was made by my head and now I am going to follow my heart again.
I am going to Polis.....

So this was the first chapter. Not very long but I have tried :) Please tell me if I should keep writing.
Thx :3