Secrets. ✍🏻

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Zayn POV

I was waiting in my car, nervously biting my nails as Harry and Liam were talking with their father inside. I couldn't get in as Harry judged it would be too heated already without the presence of another person.

I could hear the shouting from here. Of course he wouldn't let them go that easily.

I was about to get in when Harry and Liam walked out with duffle bags. Harry had tear stains on his cheeks and Liam mouth was bleeding.

- Are you ok?

I immediately asked as Harry sat next to me.

- I swear if he hit you...

He put his hand on mine and kissed my cheek.

- Don't worry he didn't hurt me.... Liam took the hit for me. It's over. We can leave now.

I looked at my ex best friend in the mirror. His face was all bruised and he had this disturbingly empty eyes as he was looking out the window.

I knew he deserved the hate, but I was thankful he was there to help Harry through it. I drove Harry to Louis house. We said our goodbyes and he promised to call me in the morning.

The road to my house was silent. Agreeing to have Liam over left a salty taste in my mouth. I was so angry at what he did to Harry, but at the same time I was trying very hard to be as comprehensive as his brother.

If Harry could forgive him maybe I could as well? Probably not. He hurt the person I loved the most after all.

When I pulled into the driveway, I helped him get his bags inside and informed him he would sleep in the guest room. Again, not much words were exchanged. I didn't feel like talking to him at all.

An hour later, I heard the shower next to my bedroom open.

I knew there was no towel in there so I took it from the cabinet outside and open the door to throw it inside for him to use. That's when I heard faint cries. I immediately felt bad. Liam was not a cry baby. He was never showing any emotions at all, I knew him for so long and this was the first time I heard him cry.

I knocked before pushing the door open a little more.

- Are you ok?

He was sitting on the floor in fetal position with nothing but his underwear on. His back was covered in bruises and as he rocked himself, I saw straight lines on arms freshly self inflicted still bleeding.

- I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I should die for what I did. I deserve to die.

- Liam... don't say that.

- You hate me, Harry hates me, Louis.... He .... He thinks I'm a monster. I hurt everyone. Everyone. I'm good for nothing. I don't deserve to be here...

I kneeled down next to him and put my hand on his back in the hope to calm him down.

- Listen Liam, I am really angry for what you did to Harry, but you don't deserve to die for it. Don't say that please. Harry would be shattered if he lost you now. You know when we talked about you guys leaving the house, he refused to leave if there was no place for you to go.

- I am so lonely. I lost everyone I cared for. I know I fucked up so bad and I can't make it better.

- You had issues to deal with on your side as well. I can't pretend to understand what you've been through... It must have been a nightmare. It does not justify anything but.... Yeah, I think you need to deal with very hard stuff. Don't beat yourself over it, you need to heal and be a better person from now on. If you prove to everyone that you can be the guy we all thought you were, maybe we will be able to forgive you.

- I feel so dirty, so used. I don't know if I can go on like this Zayn, it's too hard.

- What about we start by cleaning up you arms, I will put a mattress in my room so you are not sleeping alone tonight; alright?

As much as I needed to hate him, he was still Liam and hearing him talking about ending his days was something I could not ignore.

I cleaned up his arms as he calmed down slowly. We both went to bed and soon enough, his breathing calm down as he fell asleep.

Harry POV

The next day, Zayn texted me to meet him at his house urgently. When I got there with Louis, I found him sitting on his bed reading with Liam sleeping on a mattress on the floor. That was strange as there was two guest rooms in his house.

He put his index in front on his mouth letting us know we needed to be silent. He got up and pushed us out of the room, closing the door behind him.

- What's wrong?

- Liam he... he is not doing well. He was completely hyterical yesterday; he talked about ending it.

- What?

- Yeah he said that he was lonely and that he felt used and disgusting. He even cuts himself. Harry I think Liam needs professional help.

- I don't know Zayn, you know how he is, he will never speak with someone he doesn't know.

- I know but we need to figure something out, we can't let him commit suicide without raising a single finger.

- Let me talk to him...

Louis interrupt. We both looked at him like he was crazy. Louis was never Liam's friend. They hated each other and we knew it.

- You will hand him the knife?

- No, I ... I think I can help him. We talked the other day and... I can do this.

- You're sure? I can always...

- You've been through enough shit Harry. Take care of yourself. I'll take care of Liam, what about you sleep here for a couple of days and I take him back home with me. My parents are never there anyway, nobody will notice.

I blushed thinking about sleeping at Zayn's house.

- If it's ok with Zayn.

- Sure it is....

He said a stupid smile plastered on his face.

- Ok let's wake him up.