The Bridge (Book 1 of Xav-Verse)

CHAPTER FIVE

Gently, Richard strolled on the interlocked path of the park, around him are people --- adults, adolescents and children --- all doing their things on the cool, green, serene, cozy environment of the park. Some playing, some strolling, some having picnics while some even loving up and so on. He exhaled, stretching his hands in the pocket of his hooded jacket. The cool evening breeze hiting his figure giving a cool refreshing feeling. He sighted a concrete bench occupied by a middle aged white man, sitting at the left end of the bench reading a book. He greeted and sat at the other end, he brought out his phone and kept himself busy with it.

"You know, three things, three major things ensures a successful relationship," the man spoke to no one in particular. Richard raised his head, turned and looked at him.

"Excuse me, are you referring to me?" he asked. The man smiled.

"Yes stud. I'm speaking to you." He stared at Richard smiling. "Three things guarantees a successful relationship."

"What are they?" Richard asked, picking interest.

"One, being with a right partner. Two, relationship knowledge and three, deliberate efforts. Now, about a right partner, when I talk about a right partner, I aren't talking about a perfect person as the misconception, rather I'm talking about a person suitable for you, someone you are compatible with, someone you can flow with, someone who will love, honour, respect, provide, protect and support you through thick and thin. A right partner isn't someone who won't give you problems, he or she will but it will be less ones, remember they are imperfect humans, there's no perfection in this."

"How do you know if someone is right for you? There are two ways, the natural and the supernatural way. The natural way has to do with natural or physical means. By the natural way, how to know a right partner is, one, genetic compatibility. The both of you have to be compatible genetically to avoid sorry stories. Two, possessions of desired attributes in a desired partner. Everyone has those attributes, ranging from physique to attitude to capacities etc, that they want their partners to posses. So one way of knowing if your partner or potential partner is right for you is if he or she possesses your desired attributes in a partner or desired partner."

"Talking about attributes, there are two kinds, core attributes and necessary attributes. Core attributes are those attributes that a desired partner must posses otherwise you can't be with him or her while necessary attributes are those attributes that are not compulsory although necessary, whether your desired partner possesses them or not, that won't stop you from going on with them although you will love them to possess them. Of all the attributes by a person, seventy to ninety percent of them are necessary while ten to thirty percent are cores. On a list of ten attributes, you will be shocked to find out that only two or three are cores while the rest are necessary. So know your desired attributes in a desired partner and check if a partner or potential partner has them," he said.

"Three, he or she must believe in, values and desire love and commitment. Four, he or she must love you. So the thing is how do you know if someone loves you? Simple, one, he or she must be generous to you, that is give to you. Giving is a default and natural product of love. If a partner doesn't give to you, he or she is not only stingy but also loveless towards you. Two, he or she must support you. A supportless partner is a loveless partner. Three, he or she must pray for and with you. Four, he or she must honour you. Honour denotes loyalty, respect and promotion. Five, he or she must defend you, be it physically, verbally and mentally."

"Six, he or she must desire you. The intimate and physical desires for you will be present. Seven, he or she must have knowledge of those little things that matters a lot to you like your birthday, your favourite colour, your favourite meal, your fashion taste, your favourite music or film genre etc. It takes someone that truly loves you and committed to you to know these, because in themselves they're little or less important but they matter a lot to you. There is no ego in these, it takes genuine love and commitment to know these things. Eight, he or she must show affection to you. Affection denotes care, niceness and feelings of affection, and nine, he or she must give you attention. People give attention to who or what matters to them. If you matter to your partner, he or she will give you attention no matter how busy he or she is. That's how you know if someone loves you."