Adrift

Chapter 1

Being seventeen sucks. Everyone has expectations of your future and tries to push you toward what they think should be your next step. I had no idea what I wanted to do next. Seventeen is a prime number. Something special, at least. It was my last year of high school and I had no friends, no plans besides college, and no clue. I wondered if my classmates all knew what they wanted to do next. As I walked to school, I could see some of them up ahead laughing with friends and probably talking about what they did on their break. I wondered if any of them stayed home like I did. Despite living near a few of the other kids in my class, none of them ever walked with me. Not that they actively avoided me. At least I don't think they did. They just gravitated towards their friends. I blended in with the crowd on the street. Lots of people I saw daily going to work or school or running to the corner store for a snack. The high school was basically right in the middle of a large city. The air was thick with conversation though with all the traffic and noise I could only make out some of what was said. The crowd stopped as the light changed. There was a slight change in the noise as cars slowed around me and the cross-traffic started to move.

"Hey, wait up!" I looked around to see who was speaking. Ryou, one of the cutest and most popular girls in the class and possibly the school, was running up behind me. Is she talking to me?

"Hurry up, Ryou!" Another girl from the class was standing a few feet in front of me looking back at Ryou. That made much more sense. Koro is Ryou's best friend. I almost got excited. While I had always wished she would come up to me and talk I had no idea what I would say. It wasn't always this way. Ryou and I went to grade school together and used to play on the playground nearly every day. However, it's been years since we have had any direct interaction and as far as I knew, she was only vaguely aware that I existed. She was not the only one, either. Most of my classmates ignored my existence. At least that was what it felt like to me. I would get an occasional "hey" from random people out of politeness or whatever but only in passing and it was over as quickly as it started. Sometimes I wondered if I was at fault for my current state but could never come up with a conclusive answer. At this point does it matter? Soon, we will all go our separate ways. Is a friend worth it? I will just go back to fantasizing about Ryou talking to me.

"Hey Aki, how have you been?" she could say. That's how these scenarios usually started out in my head. We would chat a bit about school or something and she would say she missed my company and we become best friends and then lovers and then we stay together forever despite our different backgrounds and though we have some struggles we figure it out in the end. Why am I suddenly breathing hard? Hope no one notices.

I didn't mind school. A lot of it came somewhat easily to me. Not that I am bragging. I still had to study and work hard but I didn't see the need to complain as much as my classmates did. I tried to pay attention in class that day but my mind frequently wandered back to Ryou. Great, I have one near-interaction and she gets stuck in my head like a catchy song from the radio. I suppose there were worse things to get stuck in my head. The bell rings and I realized I spent most of the last few hours thinking about her. I continued to contemplate the philosophical implications of my loneliness the whole way home.

Sadly there were no other interactions with my fellow walkers, near or otherwise. Just another typical day. Most of my school days went this way. I acted like the near-interaction with Ryou was the only reason I was lost in thought but I got lost in my own mind all the time. My uneventful life led me to daydream about girls talking to me or being asked to hang out after class or to sit with them at lunch or go on a date or hold hands or...Wow, I get excited easily. Ryou was usually the one that came to mind but to be honest I probably wouldn't have minded any of the girls in my class. Most of them seemed nice and some even smiled back at me when I awkwardly tried to interact with them as we passed in the hall. In general, the others around me seemed to ignore me or at least not mind that I was there. I hear snippets of gossip sometimes and even about parties though I never get an invite personally. Little did I know that one small action would cause my life to change drastically.

It started as a normal day. I left for school at the usual time and started the usual walk down the street. At some point, Koro ended up in front of me texting and playing on her phone. Not really unusual since most kids spent a lot of time staring at their phones. I couldn't see exactly what she was typing but she seemed very focused and walked almost entirely without looking up. And then she just stopped looking up and focused on her phone entirely. As we approached an intersection, the light changed and everyone stopped. Everyone but Koro. She kept slowly moving forward toward the busy street. Being just a few steps behind her I figured she would stop right at the edge of the street but she reached it and started to step out. I took a large step forward and was able to grab just a bit of her sweater. I could hear a car coming and thought I was too late. I failed. I waited too long and now the worst has happened. Then I felt a slight tug on my hand, still holding that bit of sweater, and she stopped moving mid-step. She brought her leading foot back to the curb and I let go. She never even looked up from her phone. Never made a sound. The light changed and the other pedestrians started moving again followed quickly by Koro. I guess I did my good deed for today.

***

"Hey, wait up!" I yelled at Koro. She may have been my best friend but she had a hard time waiting for me when I was running late, which was basically always.

"Hurry up, Ryou!" she replied from halfway up the street. I may be running a little late most days but would it kill her to wait an extra 30 seconds? It's not like we were ever late to school. She just wanted to be at the school entrance when her crush arrived so she could get his attention by acting cute and innocent as he walked by. It was always entertaining to watch her try so hard for a guy who didn't seem to even realize she existed. I was a little jealous, though. I had no one to crush on or ignore my cute advances. I had several guys show some interest in me and even had a couple say they loved me but the feeling was far from mutual. None of the guys here interested me. Do I like girls? Doesn't seem any more appealing than the guys I know. I will just have to keep my options open. It was our last year of high school and Koro and I promised each other to make it the best possible. We wanted to end our high school careers with good memories and no regrets.

So far, the year has been going really well. I had good grades in all my classes and even made a couple of new friends. Maybe I will have a party at my house this weekend. It would be nice to spend some time with friends outside of school. Koro would definitely be on board but would have wanted to invite her crush. I will have to take that into account before making the decision. The bell rang and everyone made their way to their homeroom. Before I knew it, the day was over and I was walking back home. Another typical day. Nothing very exciting really happened which made me a little sad. Not that I wanted a lot of drama or anything but the occasional event to mix up the monotony might have been nice.

The next morning on the way to school was different. I was late to meet with Koro as usual but Koro wasn't there at all. Thinking Koro was also late, I decided to just walk ahead. A couple of blocks later I spotted Koro ahead of me at the next intersection. The light had just changed and the crowd was stopping so I started walking faster to catch up. But Koro wasn't stopping. I called her name but she was too far away and there was too much noise. Koro started stepping into the street and I could hardly watch. My best friend was about to be hit by oncoming traffic and I couldn't look away. Suddenly, as if she had been frozen, Koro stopped moving mid-step. For a second, her foot hung in the air. That's when I noticed the hand holding a small piece of Koro's sweater. Aki? Did Aki just save her?