Fourteen

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Some things can't be justified, only classified. 

Evil or good. 

But as Cordelia found, there were some things which could neither be justified nor classified for they were so evil, so dark and twisting yet at the same time so good, so pure and loving that you can't help but feel sympathy. Sympathy because how can something so endearing and so heart breaking could be so twisting and melancholic?

Cordelia refused to stay in the hospital wing for more than one day, she hasn't told her friends about what actually happened. Only Draco knows what happened but Cordelia has recoiled so into herself that she isn't even talking to him.

She sat in her old dorm, once again deep in the memories of the Black's pensive, she figured out that it showed different memories each time from different perspectives. This time it was Walburga's and yet it spoke more about her family than the previous memory. 

Why was Cordelia torturing herself, she didn't know. Watching those painful memories was a torture in itself. She just knew that her family gave her comfort in a twisted sort of way.

Was it the fear? Was it the tears? Or was it the laughter? The pain and the warmth?

She noticed negative feeling were more in there but she didn't care, this was her guilty pleasure.

But one more thing she noticed was, these weren't exactly like memories, these were all from a narrative point of view. They just focused on a specific member of the family.

Walburga's was just horrific, it was so different from the story Sirius told. 

As Cordelia understood their story, it was a fairy tale turned into a nightmare. All of them were so close, mad but happy. Sirius was no exception but that was before he met James.

The Blacks were very traditional and prejudiced against muggles, but they were a family. Yes, their family was rather dark but they were all happy.

Until Sirius got sorted into Gryffindor, Walburga got passive aggressive and even though, Orion didn't like it, he turned that into his own advantage in a very tactful, very Slytherin way so that people don't question them. It all settled down in about a year. But Sirius didn't, as his views changed about blood status, money and reputation, so did he. 

For Sirius, it was so weird. James' family was so different and so was Peter's and Remus', why was his family so strict, so demanding and so overbearing? He didn't understand and so he did what he thought was right, he rebelled. 

He fought with his mother whenever she talked about blood status and arranged marriage, she yelled at him and said things which she shouldn't have, things a child should never hear from his parents.

But Walburga didn't think so, the Blacks were trained to be stoic, firm, domineering and stone cold, they don't cry neither do they use 'soft' methods to discipline their children. That was how she was disciplined, her brothers and basically everyone in their family was disciplined. So why was Sirius so affected?

Because Sirius saw how his friends' parents treated them. And he liked that way better and just like every other Black, he wanted what he liked, and when he didn't, he got aggressive.

He was right in his place, but his family was different. They didn't understand and that broke him slowly, piece by piece.

Nonetheless, it only truly went downhill when Sirius brought up loving someone, a boy, a half-blood in front of his cousins and parents. 

Remus found out much later that he was a pureblood.

That was the first time Orion raised his hands at him and he found himself in front of Orion's wand.

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