Wars

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I remember those dark thoughts that surrounded my head.

The phone calls, the one where I heard, " You don't deserve him". " You can do so much better", "LEAVE HIM".

I felt as if I had everything, but I was absolutely broken inside. I wanted to turn to you so many times. I became afraid of you, I knew how cold you could be. You were a completely different person in public, around your family. You acted as if you loved me, then behind closed doors, you hated me. As if I wasn't enough, you sat there just staring at me when I would get mad. I'd scream and cry, you had no emotion.

You told me sorry one time, after so many arguments. You said they were 'disagreements', I have yet to believe that. They felt horrible, I felt like a terrible person. No matter how many times you said I wasn't. I asked if you wanted me to leave, " you said there's the door!".

I wanted you to fight for me, not let me go. I feel like you never even cared in the first place. I know some part of you, I know he loved me.

Your cold, bitter, and heartless.

I will never forgive you, nor will I ever stop loving you

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