Best friends... forever?

Chapter 8

When Mila wakes up, it takes her a moment to realize that she isn't on her room, that she's on Rúben's. That what happened last night, what they did... It was all real.

"Fuck" she says after making sure she is alone in the room, burying her face on the pillow. "Fuck, fuck, fuck."

Why did they do this? Why did they allow it? Why didn't she stop him?

"Because you didn't want him to stop" a voice says in her head.

"No" she says aloud, sitting on the bed. "This is a mistake. A huge mistake."

And that probably is the reason why Rúben is gone. He can't face her anymore and has run away, trying to avoid her for as long as he can. Because by not stopping him last night, she's ruined their friendship.

"But he didn't want you to stop him. He wanted it" that voice says again.

"No!" Mila says again, getting out of bed and looking for some clothes to wear and finding nothing. When she made it to his room, she wasn't wearing any, so one of his t-shirts will have to do.

As she moves towards his closet, Mila sees something familiar on a chair. Her clothes. The ones she usually wears around the house. Did he leave them there for her?

"Aww, isn't that cute?" that voice says again.

"Shut up" she says aloud, picking up the clothes and leaving for the bathroom.

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"Hello, you."

"Holy shit, Rúben!" Mila says, letting the shower's head fall, making a horrible noise. "What are you doing here?"

"Checking on you."

"Inside the shower? And naked?" she asks, not daring to look below his bellybutton.

"I couldn't come in wearing my clothes, they would get ruined" he shrugs.

"You could have waited outside until I was finished."

"But I was worried about you. I heard you talking to yourself and then slamming the door. I thought something may have happened."

"Yes, that I'm going crazy" Mila says to herself.

"I'm fine, I just woke up grumpy."

"Were you missing me? I was making breakfast" Rúben smiles.

"It had nothing to do with you. You know that I get grumpy when I'm tired."

"It may have had to do with me, tho. What time was it when we finally stopped?" he smirks.

"Around 4 a.m.? Maybe it was almost 5" the voice in her head says.

"I have no idea. Now if you'll excuse me" she says, turning her back at him and trying to hide that her cheeks must be as red as her United shirt.

"I can help you shower, wash your hair..." he says, taking a step closer.

"I don't need help, thank you."

"Are you sure?" he says, picking the shower's head from the floor and putting it back in place, his body very close to hers. Very, close.

"Very sure" Mila gulps.

"Really sure?" he asks, kissing her shoulder.

"Rúben..."

"What?" he says, moving to kiss her neck, his hands on her hips.

"We can't do this."

"We've already done it" he says, one of his hands slowly moving down.

"We can't do it again" she says, her body tensing under his touch, his kisses.

"Why not?"

"Because... Because it will ruin it all" Mila says, taking both his hands on hers and making him stop. "Us. Our friendship."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do" she says, turning around to look at Rúben. But turns out to be a huge mistake, because he is looking at her in a way that he had never before. Like he was about to devour her. Destroy her. Ruin her like people write on this Instagram comments. And she'll probably be asking for more, for him to do it again and again. Which is exactly what happens.

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"It can't happen again. I'm serious, Rúben."

"But why not?"

"Because it will ruin it all! How many times do I have to say it?" Mila says, getting up from the table.

After finally being able to keep their hands from each other, they are eating something that also isn't the other, Mila trying to make Rúben see that what happened last night and this morning, is a mistake.

"I don't think it will ruin it all. We clearly feel something for each other that goes beyond friendship" Rúben says.

"Something like what?"

"I don't know yet. But there is something, and you know it."

"You know it" the voice repeats.

"No. No, no, no."

"Why are you so stubborn?"

"Why are you so stubborn? Did Bruno get into your head or something?"

"He didn't. But maybe he's been right all alone."

"Oh, c'mon" Mila says, rolling her eyes.

"I'm being serious. I think our feelings for each other have changed for some reason, but we've ignored it because, like you say, we are scared of ruining what we already have. But then, as the end of the season came closer and having to kiss became something more and more real, ignoring it has become more difficult, and we've made it to a point where it's been impossible to keep lying to ourselves, all that leading to this. Listen, Mila" Rúben says, getting up from his seat and moving to where she is, taking her hands on his. "I know you probably are terrified right now. I know I am. But we could give this a go, see where it takes us. No labels of any kind. Just enjoy the summer together and see what happens."

"And what if what happens is that we ruin it all?" she says, looking at their hands.

"Then we'll find a way to fix it. Together."

"When did you think of all of this? When did you realize that this was what you wanted?"

"This morning while you were sleeping" he chuckles, one of his hands moving to her chin, lifting her face and making her look at him. "Let's give it a chance. We may regret it our whole lives if we don't do it."

"Can I think about it a bit more?" Mila asks.

"Of course you can" he says before kissing her cheek, something he had done many times before, and that she herself had done too. It was normal between them. But this time it felt different. This time, her stomach did funny things when she felt his lips on her skin.