DIARY OF VALERIA - THE WRATH OF GAKUD

Chapter 3 - Just a Man Crush

I was flustered when I reached my station and Mitch noticed it right away. She asked what happened but then she was already logged in and a call came in the queue so I wasn't able to answer her question. I was self-conscious the whole time I was with Martin inside the bathroom and I didn't know why. He didn't do anything to me, he just greeted me and we exchanged hi and hello and he didn't even mention that he caught me smiling by myself like an idiot because if he did I would definitely die right there with shame.

Why did he make me nervous? It was strange and something inside me told me that I was happy to see him. As if it was an ignition rooted at the bottom of my body, a sunflower opened as it was hit by sunlight. Should I encourage this emotion? But it seemed that I didn't have control over it. I noticed everything about him, to his beaming face, toned body and army cut hair. He was wearing a fitted royal blue round neck shirt and slim cut jeans with a baller cup tucked in his back pocket. He was about to brush his teeth when he saw me. He was so different, so opposite of my lanky skinny body, my white complexion to his dark smooth brown skin. I was wearing a slacks and polo shirt with a plain black hooded jacket. My normal long wavy hair kept brushing my lashes. I didn't notice that I was staring at my computer for quite a while thinking about the incident in the bathroom with Martin until I heard Cristi shouting from her station ordering me to auto in.

Calls coming in non-stop. I didn't have the chance to chat with Mitch until lunch time because she was busy cursing almost every call. The production floor became a warzone and team leaders running left and right to take supervisor calls requested by the customers. We tried very hard to de-escalate but when the customers were really insistent to speak to a supervisor, all you needed to do is write a note in their accounts.

We went downstairs to take our lunch and my eyes scanned the vicinity as we exited the production floor to where the elevator was. I was searching for Martin, hoping to see him somewhere and I didn't know why. This kind of emotion was new to me as I have never been attracted to anyone before, I had girl crushes back in the day but never with guys. I shrugged the thought out of my head, it was just probably a man crush? I wasn't sure.

Martin was the first guy I met when I entered the building when I came for the interview. I was kinda lost and he was right there on the side seeping a macchiato from Starbucks. He was the one who gave me direction when I told him where I was heading. During the orientation day I bumped into him in the hallway of the training area. I didn't know that he was working in the same company where I would be working. He congratulated me and introduced himself as Martin while gently extending his hand to shake mine. He was nice and not bad looking at all. Okay, he was probably as good looking as my best friend Albert but they were different in so many ways.

I shook my head trying to erase the thoughts. Why am I comparing Martin to Albert? This was getting weirder, it had to stop. But how? Lately I've been finding myself looking for Martin when I get to the office. Am I gay or bisexual? Does it matter? Ugh. But I took this chance to get my mind off Valeria. Thinking about Martin helped my sanity a lot and at the same time kept me in check with reality. I couldn't be obsessing about creatures that supposedly existed only in the fictional world but it didn't mean that Valeria and Gakud weren't real because I saw them and I even sat and talked with her.

Despite everything, I was allowing myself to think about something else and if Martin was there as diversion then be it. Whatever the consequences were, it didn't matter. Besides, I believed that I was born without sexuality, and if my preference was directed towards the opposite sex or not or both? It didn't matter. I was here to love because if not with love then what is? Love doesn't seclude anyone because love is for everyone. So whoever I was going to fall in love with in the future? That was between me and that person and the world could shut its mouth.

"Knock... knock... Ice are you there? Are you with me?" It was Mitch standing in front of me. She was waving a hand in front of my face to get my attention.

I blinked twice in time for the elevator door to open and Mitch pulled me as we exited out of the ground floor and out of the building. It was already 2AM and all the establishments were already closed except for a few fast-food restaurants within the Eastwood city limit. The air was humid for the past few days now, the temperature rose since the entire country was moving towards summer.

I couldn't dare to look at Mitch for I didn't want her to see me blushing. She'd caught me many times these days locked in some limbo of day dreaming and I didn't want to tell her yet that it was about someone she knew.

"Sorry, I was distracted earlier." I said while we were walking along the Citywalk.

"Yeah. You've been acting like that lately. What's wrong?" She asked without looking at me. I didn't answer right away, still weighing if I wanted to tell her or not about Martin but I was still confused so I decided to pick the latter. Instead I told her something else.

"I was thinking about ideas for what to put in the blog. I've been hitting walls lately and Albert is nagging me about it." I said. "So where are we eating?"

Mitch stopped and turned to face me. There was that familiar smirk in her face telling me that she understood my struggle. She reached out and gently squeezed my arm. The smirk disappeared as her face lightened as if she just had an epiphany.

"Come on Ice! I know where we are going." She sprinted ahead of me.

I stood there with a smile on my face, shaking my head as I followed.

"About time. I'm starving."