Shake My Faith

"Well good morning to you, darling, how's this Sunday morning treating you so far?"

You recognized the voice the moment you stepped out of your car, and your eyes lifted to see Pastor Kiszka leaning against the entryway of the church, a wide smile on his face as he watched you walk towards him.

"Good as I can be Kelly. Are the boys in yet?"

"Yes they are hun, Jake is up in the sound booth getting stuff ready for worship, and I believe Josh is in the youth room setting something up."

You stopped by the sound booth first, cracking open the door and finding Jake sat at the booth fiddling with the slideshow for worship.

"Working hard Jake?" Your question broke his concentration, and he turned to you with a wide grin.

"Always, are you feeling nervous about being the lead for worship today?" He had spun himself around in his chair to fully face you, an eyebrow raised as he absentmindedly played with the buttons of his shirt.

You caught yourself glancing downwards at his fidgeting hands "I'm as confident as ever, you're the one that seems nervous."

"Yeah... Well, I usually stick to just playing guitar. I don't know how you convinced me to actually sing with you and Josh."

"I guess it's just this beautiful face, it tends to convince a lot of men to do what I ask." You tease with a soft punch to his shoulder. "You'll be fine, I promise."

You turned to leave, tilting your head back just before you closed the door, "And if not, I'm sure the congregation wouldn't mind if you decided to step back into your usual spot."

The hall was quiet as you made your way down to the youth room in search of Josh. You passed Karen in the office on your way, giving her a wave and smile before slipping through the youth room door.

You caught sight of Josh across the room, his face looking down at a list of what you assumed were the activities he had planned for the kids.

"Can you believe that we've been planning these since highschool?" You snuck up behind him, chin resting gently on his shoulder.

He leaned his head against yours, his arm finding its way around your waist to pull you around to his side, "We've been waiting to be youth leaders since we were in the youth group, this has been years in the making."

Comforted by his warmth you let a gentle sigh fall from your lips. "I remember sitting right over there with you giggling about how we could have done better."

He chuckled in response, looking up at you with a toothy grin, "Not that it would be hard, no offense to Keith, but he was not a good leader."

Your cheeks puffed out at your attempt to internalize the laughter. "To be fair you do make it look a lot easier than it is. Either that, or we were just horrible kids."

"We? That's a joke. Me and Jake sure, but you," He lifted a finger to brush against the cross hanging low on your chest, "you were a little angel."

"I'm still an angel. Thank you." You pretended to be offended and playfully pushed him away, "Do you think we're going to be doing this forever?"

"I hope not." His eyes moved away from your face for a moment before returning. "Don't get me wrong, I love this place, and the people, but I feel like I'm not here anymore because of faith, I'm just here because my dad is the pastor... it's kind of expected of us."

His momentary lack of eye contact forced you to glance across the room as he spoke. "Would it make you feel better if I said I felt the same way? With the lack of faith I mean... It just seems like the older we get the less I follow what we've been taught."