Hogwarts 1971-1979

I hate you or Do I hate myself?

Reggie can back for another year of Hogwarts. He looked skinny, pale and ill, he always did after coming back from the noble house of black. But this time he was shaking, shaking and shaking. Both of the Black brothers always looked like this when they came back from their parents house after the break. Sirius went into the compartment where his friends were and lied down and cuddled into Remus. But Sirius spent this break at the Potters he was just happy to spend time with his boyfriend. Reggie walked past looking worse than usual, he walked to were his friends were. He put his bag on the top and slumped on Barty. Barty said "Bad break mate?" 

Reggie said "Isn't it always." They nodded. He stayed their until they got to school. 

The next day he got up, he had slept in his long sleeves the night before and went to the bathroom. He got dressed and made sure his sleeves were completely over his wrists. He didn't want anyone to see he was too ashamed. Barty knocked "Reggie come on we gotta go." 

Reggie said "Barty I'm coming, wait a minute." Reggie came out of the bathroom. He put on his shoes and grabbed his bag. He made his way to the common room. Barty and Reggie left. When they got down to breakfast, Evan was already sat there across from Pandora. Barty sat next to Evan and Reggie next to Pandora. Evan said "Geez! Reggie you look dead." 

Reggie said "Yeah I know." He put his head on Pandora's shoulder. 

Pandora said "What do you have today?" 

Reggie said "Potions, DADA, Charms, transfiguration, Herbology and magical creatures." 

Pandora said "Same, wanna walk together?" 

Reggie said "Yeah sure." 

Barty said "Me and Evan have the same schedule but different to yours." Reggie nodded. He didn't eat any breakfast. After him and Pandora started walking to potions. Pandora said "Reggie? What happened?" 

Reggie said "What do you mean?" 

Pandora said "You look worse than usual." 

Reggie said "Thanks for that." 

Pandora said "You know what I mean." 

Reggie said "I'm fine, I will be. Just a rough break." 

Pandora said "Reggie you need help."

Reggie said "It's okay. I'll be fine after a week."

Pandora said "Sirius doesn't look as bad."

Reggie said "Come on were gonna be late." He tried to run off Pandora grabbed his wrist "Ouch!" Reggie froze and so did Pandora then she just hugged him tight. Pandora said "Oh Reggie! Please tell me next time. I will never make fun of it." Reggie let a few tears fall. Pandora said "Is it anywhere else?" Reggie shook his head, he lied of course. "Straight after class we will get this sorted out." Reggie nodded and they continued down the hallway. After class they found a quiet corner were Reggie showed Pandora. She grabbed bandages and bandages all the way from his wrists to his elbows. Reggie pulled his shirt over it again then they were off to class number two.

During class James came in. To talk to the teacher it was bogart's James was at the side talking with the teacher. As Reggie stepped up it turned into his mother and all of a sudden he was shaking so badly the class laughed but Reggie was terrified. He tried to get the word 'ridikulus' out of his mouth and flick his wand but that didn't happen. He knew the others would make fun of him for being afraid of his own mother but everyone knew the Black family had secrets and the other Slytherin's, well most of them were treated simarly by their parents. He was shaking and terrified. He was so lightheaded. When the teacher came up to spell it Reggie passed out. He woke up in the hospital wing with the curtains drawn and madam Pomfery was healing him and wrapping him in bandages. Refreshing the ones on his wrists. She then let him put his shirt and jumper on then opened the curtains. Pandora was so relived and so was Evan and Barty and so was James. James was here? Reggie spat out "What are you doing here? Potter."
James said "I came to see if you were alright."
"Why don't you go fuss over my brother?"
"Jesus I just came to check on you Regulus."
"Whatever." Regulus stood up grabbed his tie and robe and left. He ran down the stairs and found a quiet spot. He sat there. He just looked at what he had done to himself. He had mutilated himself. How would someone love him now? Pandora found him, she sat down next to him and said "Reggie I know, I know why but don't do it here please you've got us all to talk to."

Reggie said "I know I just hate it you know."

"Do you hate it? Or yourself?"

"What?"

"Do you hate them and him? Or do you hate yourself."

"I don't know both I guess maybe?"

"Okay, we are gonna try and get through this, I promise. I love you." Little did they know James fucking Potter was around the corner listening in. They got up off the floor, and walked around the corner. Regulus stopped "Potter don't tell him."

James said "What Regulus?"

"It's my buisness not yours not his."

"Reggie, he needs to know."

"It won't be a surprise you know?"

"Reg why?"

"Because I can." 

"Reggie."

"I hate myself! Okay?"

"That's  not okay." Before James could do or say anything else, Regulus left he needed to know the truth. 

Did he hate them?

or 

Did he hate Himself?