Dysfunctional daydreams

Her eyes.

Watching her eyes were the most fascinating thing to me. it was as if I was looking in to the edge of the universe watching the stars dance teasing me with questions. what was she thinking? what was she feeling? what was she really on the inside deep down where no one can see? these things danced inside my head at night. the feelings were getting to much, I was terrified. I care about another breathing human being in a romantic way and I don't have the social skills to understand or handle it. I'm a mess I can't take it my body quivers at just the idea of her touch which I am not deserving of nor will I ever be. she brought out the best of me, and at the same time I could not offer anything nearly as wonderful. all I could give her was someone to use for emotional fulfillment till she was done and ready to go on her way. it know just as well as the rest of the world I am unworthy of her love, her time, her presence. she boggled my mind and stopped me from thinking straight. I'm under her spell, and God knows I don't want to be free.