Rudra-Nandani

49 ~ Rudra Only Wants Nandani

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Rudra POV

"You can avenge your father's death, you can do whatever you want. And, let me know when you will do that. I will not stop you, I will not even try to make you understand what you are doing wrong. I will not even tell you the truth. I will not say a single word. I will leave you with victory and best wishes for your future,"

She said and my heart split in two. My eyes swelled up with tears and I could feel the uneasiness, burden and heaviness bubbling up in my chest. I looked at her, tearful eyes, redness appearing in the corner of her eyes and the trails of tears rolling down her flushed cheeks.

My eyes tried to comprehend the emotions on her face, trying to understand and wanting to negotiate.

But, my words hung in my throat and I tried to speak.

"Nandani,"

She blinked looking into my eyes. I could see the immense respect and depth of oceans filled with love, all for me and the fierceness and a wildfire burning at the shores of that ocean that was telling me that her decision was final and without any room for amendment.

Slowly with the silence, our eyes looking into each other, I felt as if the sky, the world except us started fading away for me. It started compressing, it started shrinking, and it started becoming smaller and smaller.

A world where only I and her exist, with no past, no future, no expectations, no results, no hope, no tears, no happiness, no sorrow, no joy, just us. Staring at each other, diving deep into each other, without any words, without any expression of feelings, just us.

A life, that I wanted to live, ahead, for the rest of the breaths that I was allotted this life. A life which had no meaning without her. If my past was the motive of my life then she was my home. If my revenge was the mountain that I wanted to climb then she was the base of the mountain to which I would come after conquering it. If my goals were my life then she was the death which was certain and the reality. If killing her parents was my aim then she was that water which I would drink after getting tired of aiming.

In simple words, she was the solace that I would want to have after accomplishing anything in my life.

And, if I would never get that solace, that water, that base of the mountain, that silence, that relief, that home, what would be the point of living, what would be the point of conquering that mountain, what would be the point of aiming that arrow, what would be the point of life which would not have the death, what would the point of that motive and what would be the point of becoming Rana Rudra Dev Singh if there would be no Queen Nandani for him.

Tears rolled down my cheeks and I could feel my heartbeats slowing down. My voice felt hoarse and shaky when I said.

"Aap to humse hamari jindagi ke badle jeene ki ummed hi maang rahi hai, Nandani. Aap to humse hamari jindagi ke badle uske Maine hi maang rahi hai, aap to humse hamari jindagi ka maqsad, hamare maa-baap ko hi chodne ko keh rahi hai,"

"You are asking for the hope of living in exchange for my life, Nandani. You are asking for its meaning in exchange for my life, you are asking me to leave the purpose of my life, my parents,"

She lowered her gaze and I noticed a few strands of her hair flowing with the wind. Another few drops of tears fell from her eyes and settled on her collarbones. She sobbed a little and lifted her gaze back to me.

"Humne to apne jeene ki umeed aapke liye pehle hi chod di, Rudra. Humne to apni jindagi ke maaine pehli hi badal diye, humne to pehle hi apni jindagi ka maqsad, apne maa-baap ko aapke liye chod diya, Rudra. Jis din aapke kakash me humne kadam rakha ye jaante hue ki aap hamare dushman ke bete hai, humne to apne maa baap ko daga de hi diya,"